Polo! (how many RPs do you do at any one time? xD)

((Nhaaaaaa!!! Amazing!!!! Goodness me, Dreamehkins, you're unbelievable. These posts are always worth the wait! I'm quite tired and headachey now, but if I still have today's muse tomorrow, then I shall reply then! Haha!
Loved this post - possibly one of my favourites! *Claps*))

((Oooh, wait a minute, I've missed an important line out I'll fix that in a moment...
Unbelievable? Yeah, whatever Polo. You'd say that, only because you're too nice to say otherwise, admit it
Still, thanks anyway! the line probably won't make much difference to you, but it'll bother me forever if I don't add it in, soon Just a sec...))

((*Scoffs* You're just too modest to admit that you agree with me.
But... Let's not get started on that endless battle again... Let's just go with "We're awesome", and leave it at that. XD Never fails!

Ooooh, new line! Yippee! I mean, I was going to read it 3 more times anyway, but if there's a new line, it gives me an excuse to read it even more without being crazy or obsessed! ))

((Agree to disagree ladies, agree to disagree xD))

((Rorah: We've already agreed to disagree with that statement.
Are you really still stalking us... The Polo is suddenly feeling somewhat self conscious... ))

((Hehehehhh...Rorah is stalking....Rorah shall always be waiting for another post...
I'm actually quite enjoying watching you RP xD Don't be self conscious Polokins m'dear, a lot of your posts keep me on the edge of my seat wanting more!
*Smacks hand* I really must stop typing now. BAD RORAH. I shall leave you be ^^ ))

((*chases Rorah* Hello Madame Stalker Yes, we go through this far too often, but I will not back down! Rorah, please tell our Polokins that she is amazingly awesome, since I can't persuade her...
Oh, you already have See, Polo? If you can't agree with me, agree with Rorah. She knows what she's talking about
Okay, I shall go write that line... ))

((Haha! Naaw, I'm glad. Thanks Rorah. I'm sure you agree that recently the quality of my posts has been sloppy, though... Except the last one. That was okay. ^_^ *Nods*

Dreameh: Ha! You're delusional. You and Rorah both. XD *Snickers*
Nah, just kidding. I know I'm awesome. I'm just not quite as awesome as you... But no matter, since you're like... Superhuman, or something. It isn't a fair comparison.

You're mean! Now I want to know what the line was going to be... *Twitch* I must know... O.o Tell me? ))

((Oh my word! Our RP's one year anniversary is in 2 months!!! Dreameh, how awesome are we? ))

((Haha! Woot!! We really are, aren't we? But we're both going to agree, that this little twisty thingy isn't the finale, is it? Someone should die before we do, someone that isn't Kougu, or Kougu's daddy *nodnod* I'm thinking... someone close to Charlie I have an idea, but I won't tell you yet, since it would kill the concept of 'surprise'
And nope, I refuse to tell you. It's not particularly exciting, but I shall make you wait, nonetheless *pokes*))

((Dreameh, I don't know about you, but if this was the finale, then I would end up curled up a corner bawling my eyes out and yelling "I wasn't ready for this to end!"
Most likely singing songs about failed relationships as well, only relating them to the RP... *Ponders*
Bottom line: I would be terribly depressed if we ended this RP. XD I think we should keep it going for as long as it lasts, even after its one year anniversary... Obsessed Polo.

And you're mean. -_- I know exactly who you're talking about, and as I said before: MEAN!! Poor Charlie!
Goodness me. We do torture our characters, don't we?

Anyway, to let you know, I will have my reply finished today. I'm 600 words in... And although I'm taking a break, I always have to finish things the day I start them, or it annoys the hell out of me. But right now, my head hurts.))

((Yeah, same Good plan, we'll keep it going for as long as, and me thinks we should really introduce a few more characters, because so far we have... *counts fingers* five. Plus, according to us, it's an extremely quite town they live in XD The only background charris we've come across have been a shop keeper, two old ladies and a jack russel terrier

Oh yeah, My Immortal definitely will come in handy at some point But hey, she needs to understand how he feels, since as nice as she is, she's also incredibly selfish at the moment
We most certainly do

Okay, that's great! Don't expect such a quick reply from me, though I'll look forward to reading it later ^_^))

((Don't mind the last paragraph. I just couldn't leave it at 6900 words. So I plonket a cherry on top. XD It now stands at 7084 words. *Takes a bow* New personal best, thank you! *Is strangely proud, despite sloppy quality of boring, babbly post*))


The night air was bitterly cold, and it stroked Kougu’s skin with icy fingers as he walked. The chill sent a shiver scuttling down his spine, and he rolled his shoulders a few times for fear that stiffness might set in. He needed his full strength for this moment… Yet every step he took, it became ever clearer: He couldn’t win. He had never been able to overcome the incomprehensible strength of his father’s cunning mind. That man could convince a lion that he was a lamb with just a few well-chosen words.
Kougu sighed softly, despair slowly sinking into his thoughts.
What am I doing? He wondered silently, How can I possibly succeed? And what good will this do if I fail?
He stopped walking for a moment, letting his doubts fill his mind. Maybe this was a bad idea, after all. Maybe I should just go back…
He bit his lip, slowly turning his head to stare back the way he had come – his thoughts conflicting in his mind as he struggled to decide what to do.
But if I can’t do this, then what is the point of me? If I can’t do this, I might as well never have existed at all…
Kougu frowned, gnawing on his lip even harder – not even noticing when the barely-healed wounds from the last time cracked upon to seep hot, metallic blood over his tongue.
Well, if I might as well be dead for not trying, then I might as well die trying. At least it would validate my existence… Besides, I don’t plan on accepting failure before the fight has even begun. I’m stronger now than I was before. I’ll be meeting with that despicable man on a level field.
He licked his lips, his tongue sweeping away the delicate beads of blood that glistened in the moonlight. Then he gritted his teeth, squared his shoulders, and resolved to give this one last swing everything he had. He wouldn’t lose. He couldn’t lose!
His expression hardened, and Kougu’s midnight-blue eyes held a steely determination, if only for a moment. With one blink, his eyelids swept all thoughts and feelings from his eyes, and Kougu relaxed his facial features into a perfectly neutral expression. His father could read him like a book, but not if the pages were blank. He would not give that man anything… Anything to use against him!
Shaking his head to chase the grim thoughts away, Kougu walked on – the soles of his shiny shoes tapping smartly against the cold tarmac to emphasize every step he took. For a while, the air was still and silent, and Kougu walked into it with goosebumps rising on the back of his neck from the bittersweet chill.

”Kougu?”
The desperate shout ripped through the still night, echoing emptily around the deserted street. It seemed to bounce from surface to surface a while, then finally dwindled into nothingness, letting a blanket of silence fall over the dark, peaceful world once more – if only for a moment.
Kougu!
There it came again, ravaging the silence for a second time, and this time shattering the peaceful barrier around Kougu’s mind. The familiar voice reached him first – the pained urgency in its tone clearly apparent, and his lips parted in a silent gasp.
Next, his mind registered the sound of his name, seeming to bounce off the walls of his skull and echo even within his brain.
“Charlie…” He whispered, his breath brushing his lips in a blissful sigh at the sound of her voice. Without a second thought, Kougu spun on his heel and began running back toward her, but after a few strides he caught himself, and skidded to a stop.
“No…” He whispered painfully, clenching his jaw and forcing himself to turn away. “No… I can’t.”
Kougu felt a muscle start twitching in his neck as he forced himself to turn away from the sound of Charlie’s voice and keep walking.
It was the strangest sensation… He’d never felt anything quite like it. When he’d turned away like that, it was as though he had left a part of himself behind. The term ‘out of body experience’ came to mind, and for the first time, Kougu fully understood it. He felt as though he was still standing in the middle of the street, right where he’d decided to leave Charlie, watching his own retreating back as he walked away.Coward. He thought bitterly, You can’t even muster up the courage to say goodbye.
Kougu’s shoulders stiffened at the insult, and he soon found himself retorting – waging a violent mental war, while his feet plodded mindlessly on toward his destination.

I did say goodbye. I hugged her, didn’t I? That ought to be enough for a gesture of farewell.
Oh, really?
Yes, really.
Even if she didn’t know that was your way of saying goodbye?
Well… Well, yeah…
Gosh, you’re pathetic. Think Charlie’d agree that your actions were a sufficient farewell?
…
That’s what I thought.
It’s better this way – Charlie won’t be sad to see me go if she’s angry about the way I left.
That’s rubbish, and you know it. You’re just selfish.
Either way, if I say goodbye, she’ll try to stop me. I’m not strong to deal with that… And I have to do this.
Damn.
What?
This time you’re right.
About time you admitted it.
…

When Kougu finally resurfaced from his thoughts, he found himself walking down a dark, quiet street. Too dark… Too quiet. All the streetlamps were broken, aside from one directly overhead that flickered with an orange light – casting a gilded glow over his spotless suit. Kougu stared up into its bright bulb – barely feeling the way it burned his retinas. As he watched it, it gave a few last, feeble flickers – then the glow was extinguished, leaving him cast completely into darkness. He breathed a soft sigh, watching as his breath turned to steam in the cold night air.
He glanced nervously over his shoulder, then turned back to the streetlamp, slowly placing a hand on the cold, metal surface. His pale fingers stretched out like the legs of a spider, and Kougu was forced to repress a shudder as a familiar nightmarish image flashed through his mind.
Those hands had always looked best covered in blood. It was as though they were made for it.
Kougu sighed softly, then removed his hand from the streetlamp and glanced around yet again. He was certain to was here somewhere… The headquarters of his father’s little ‘organization’. He hadn’t been there in so long… It had been nearly a decade since his last visit.
With a delicate frown creasing his features, Kougu searched the area for anything that might jar his memory as to where the entrance was.
Then he saw it: The rusty old dumpster, just like any other, only now he remembered why it was so special.
It wasn’t the dumpster, oh no… It was what was underneath that mattered.
With a subtle smirk, Kougu stepped forward and pushed the dumpster effortlessly aside, revealing a stretch of pavement, just like any other. It was dirty, but plain – completely unspectacular. His father had always had a flair for dramatics. That was exactly why this inconspicuous entrance was his finest work.
Kougu slowly lowered himself to his knees, taking care not to crease his suit, and began feeling around on the paving stones like a blind man searching for his glasses. Finally, his long fingers found that one crack that was just a little bigger than any other. He hooked his fingers into it, and effortlessly lifted the slab of concrete, revealing a dark hole underneath. It was into this that Kougu sprung – the hard soles of his shoes striking the metal floor with a resounding clang.
As soon as he was enclosed in the metal box, a soft whirring sound caught his attention, and the next moment the concrete slab had been lowered on its hydraulic hinges to revert back to its permanent role of ‘roof’. The moment it had closed and darkness engulfed him, a light flickered on overhead, and then the buttons on the side of the metal box – which Kougu now recognized as an elevator – became visible.
He selected the correct button – floor 10, the lowest – then braced himself against the side of the elevator, preparing for its movement.

Suddenly, it lurched downwards, and Kougu stumbled forward with a clatter at the sudden movement. Bile rose in his throat, and he clapped a hand over his mouth, willing himself not to be sick as the elevator reached the next floor, then lurched again. He felt nauseous and lightheaded as he leaned back against the cold metal wall behind him.
Just eight floors left to go…
Lurch.
Seven…
Lurch.
Six…
Kougu gagged again as the elevator gave another horrible lurch – this one causing his stomach to flop horribly. He suddenly wished he hadn’t eaten that slice of eggy bread…
This reminded Kougu of Charlie, and as her image filled his mind, he felt his knees weaken – and sank slowly to the ground. He sat in the corner, hugging his knees to his chest in a childlike fashion, and wished that she was here.
He didn’t want to do this… He didn’t want to leave her. But he just didn’t have a choice… He had to destroy his father – it was his destiny. A destiny that he could not fight. If only he had told her he was going. If only he had said his final goodbyes, and left with her blessing, rather than sneaking deceitfully away behind her back, and leaving her calling out for him into an empty night. He felt terrible about what he had done, but it was too late to take it back now.
“Forgive me, Charlie.” Kougu murmured quietly as the elevator finally shuddered to a stop.
“Honest to God, I never meant to hurt you. But you’ll never know that now… It’s too late.”
Kougu’s lips lifted into a faint smile as he realized he was talking to himself, and with this came the bittersweet realization that his words would never reach Charlie’s ears ever again. For some reason, this thought steeled his determination, and Kougu found himself feeling ready.
He closed his eyes, taking one final moment to prepare, and wiped all hints of emotion from his mind. When he heard the soft ‘ping’ of the elevator doors beginning to slide apart, Kougu’s eyes sprung open, and he watched the gap between the doors as it grew gradually wider. Once it had opened all the way, he stood, and brushed himself off with dignity.
Flicking one last imaginary spech of dust from the shoulder of his suit, Kougu stepped smartly through the heavy double doors, and out into the brightly-lit corridor outside.

Everything was white – too white – and it reeked of detergent. It was like stepping into some sort of sick, futuristic hospital. The long corridor was lit from overhead by a thousand tiny, fluorescent bulbs, and they glowed such a bright, ice white that a person felt blinded just staring at the monotonous whiteness all around. Kougu couldn’t see either end of the corridor – it just seemed to stretch on and on into endless nothingness – as though it were a tunnel to Heaven.
Or, in his case, a tunnel to Hell. By the time he reached his father’s office, it might well be… Shaking his head against the blinding brightness, Kougu dashed along the smooth marble floor – his footsteps ringing so loudly that he wanted to wince at each step. He couldn’t believe there was nobody chasing him yet… Where was all the security in this place? He had been expecting shouts and explosions – a couple of lasers, at the very least… But as it were, everything was suspiciously… Empty. He could feel his tension levels rapidly escalating. Perhaps that was the plan…? To stress intruders out of their minds before they even arrived at the first hint of security? To rob them of their sanity right off the bat?
Well, if that was the case, his father was in for a terrible surprise. He had never had anything as troublesome as ‘sanity’ to begin with.
Smirking slightly at this thought, Kougu closed his eyes against the endless expanse of white and sprinted onwards – the rhythmic echoing of his footsteps now sounding like music to his ears.
It was the sound of solitude, and ah, how he relished it…
Finally, the echo of his footsteps changed ever so slightly, and Kougu’s eyes sprung open to see a type of crossroads approaching up ahead.
He slowed his pace, and stepped quietly out of the white tube, emerging into a large hall. It had the same white marble floor, only this room was huge and square – most unlike the claustrophobia-inducing tunnel-like passageway that had brought him here. Within the room, men in suits moved like robots – all carrying papers, clipboards or weapons and only occasionally exchanging words. Their expressions were blank, as though they were incapable of thought. To Kougu, they looked brainwashed – and it was a despicable sight. He curled his lip in disgust, then fell into the tide of mindless zombies walking through the hall.
He soon came across a door that stirred something in his memory, so Kougu passed through it without hesitance – hoping that he was taking the correct route.
He found himself in another passageway now – this one slightly dimmer than the first, unless it only appeared that way because his eyes had become accustomed to the optical din.
In this passageway, Kougu walked slower – some sixth sense alerting him to the presence of danger. The hairs on the back of his neck bristled, and he paused a moment – coming to a standstill and staring around at the nothingness that encircled him.
Something is here. He thought stubbornly to himself, paranoia wrapping its icy clutches around his brain. I know something is here.
The suspense was enough to drive a man mad, but this time – Kougu was certain that this was not one of his father’s mind games, but real danger! He proceeded with caution, walking stiffly on his toes in preparation for something to jump out at him - but nothing did. Eventually he came to the end of the corridor, and still, nothing had attacked him. Kougu frowned, feeling extremely unnerved by the fact that his own brilliant mind had mislead him with a false alarm.

Seeing yet another door in front of him, Kougu pushed it hesitantly open and stepped into the room – his defenses inadvertently lowered by the lack of danger thus far. Suddenly, a resounding bang echoed throughout the room, and Kougu glanced down with a dull expression as he felt something brush past his arm. He stared in disbelief as he noticed a rip on his sleeve that hadn’t been there before, and crimson blood slowly blooming around it – drops falling down onto the white marble floor like petals from a red rose.
Another bang echoed through the room, and Kougu felt a breeze whoosh past his ears – ruffling the soft tendrils of inky black hair that hung beside his face.
Finally, Kougu snapped back to his senses. He shook his head rapidly, then clamped a hand over his bleeding arm with a snarl – dashing forward toward the opposite end of the room.
The moment he moved, bullets began firing haywire – tiny soldiers of death ricocheting off every smooth white surface in the room to fly toward him. Kougu dodged them with frenzied actions – sucking in a breath through his teeth when one clipped the side of his leg – then releasing it in a hiss as another narrowly missed his head.
Kougu remembered this room. He had been in here many times before… This was where his father tested weapons. One of the four walls in the room was made of thick one-way vision glass. The shooters on the other side could see him – but he could not see them or the tiny holes they fired through, which gave the impression that the bullets did not come from any source at all.
Reaching this conclusion, Kougu waited with tense, twitching muscles – fully alert – for a new bullet to appear.
When one did, he ducked to avoid it, then dashed at full speed toward the wall it had come from. He whipped out his own gun as he ran, and began firing repeatedly at the same spot. The glass chipped with the first bullet, cracked with the next, and after three more shots – it had shattered completely, just in time for Kougu to leap through the rain of broken glass into the observation room. The shooters inside crouched down on the floor with frightened yells, raising their arms to shield their heads instinctively, despite the thick helmets they wore.
Without hesitance, Kougu fired one quick shot at each of the four men – trusting his father’s technologically advanced helmets to protect the men’s lives.
Hopefully, his bullets would just knock the men out. If now… Well, all was fair in love and war. He wouldn’t have to live long with the guilt anyway…

Kougu stared down at the men’s lifeless forms with a blank, emotionless expression – then slipped his gun back into his pocket. He clamped one hand over his bleeding arm, and limped from the room – heading out through a door on the side to enter yet another white, tube-like passageway – this one much shorter.
With the spring of success in his step, Kougu limped to the end and swung the next door confidently open.
He stared around the empty room – noting the faint remnants of a mist-like substance drifting through the air. Kougu narrowed his eyes, squinting hard at the one tendril of mist as it wafter through the air. Sure enough, as it reached a certain point, a red light glowed through it for a moment – then vanished as it drifted on.
“Lasers.” Kougu murmured softly to himself, smiling slightly and lifting a hand to the scar on his collarbone. Obviously, his father had found that particular weapon to his liking. Kougu was glad he had been able to assist in the testing of it.
Smirking bitterly, Kougu crept through the doorway, stepping carefully.
Had his father not tested that awful laser on him that time, Kougu would probably have been diced and cooked in this room – expertly prepared for a cannibal’s dinner. But as it were, he had expected this, and he had come prepared.
From a pocket inside the jacket of his suit, Kougu withdrew a small spray bottle. He squeezed the top down a couple of times to release a faint haze of mist, and as the laser beams shone up, he navigated his way carefully around them – feeling as though he were playing some bizarre, deadly game of twister. He curved athletically around the beams, spraying from the bottle in his hand every now and then to assist with his visibility.
After what felt like an eternity, Kougu squirmed his way to the opposite wall.
Smirking smugly, he dropped the spray bottle back into his pocket – leaving a thick cloud of mist in his wake – and stepped confidently forward, walking right into the door in front of him with a dull ‘thud’.
Kougu staggered backward, slightly cross-eyes and blinking dazedly, then leaped forward again with a yelp as a laser seared his ankle. He cursed under his breath, then fumbled with the doorknob and finally wrenched the door open, hurrying into the next room.
Only I could navigate through a maze of lasers, do be outsmarted by a simple door. Kougu reflected with a bitter chuckle, rolling his eyes at his carelessness.
Really…

With a heavy sigh, Kougu stared suspiciously around the room he was in – waiting for something to happen – but nothing did.
Just when he had decided this room was another ‘no-danger mind trap’, the lights suddenly went out, leaving the white room bathed in such thick darkness that Kougu could not even see his own pale hand in front of his face.
He tensed instantly, falling into a defensive stance as he waited to see what danger was approaching – but nothing stirred.
In fact, nothing at all happened for well over five minutes. By this time, Kougu was just starting to relax again, when suddenly his keen nose picked up on a distantly familiar scent. The sickly sweet odour made him feel instantly drowsy, and Kougu quickly clapped a hand over his nose and mouth as he recognized it as nitrous oxide – better known as laughing gas – a substance notorious for knocking people out.
Once he was unconscious in this hellhole, he was done for!
Holding his breath – he ran hurriedly around the room like a caged pigeon, searching for an exit, but to no avail… He simply couldn’t find one.
Just when he was about to give up all hope and take a breath of the deadly gas – Kougu noticed some barely visible outcroppings on the wall nearest him, and dashed toward him. Camouflaged perfectly with the bright white of the wall, the tiny outcroppings formed what were unmistakably rungs of a ladder. Without the slightest hesitance, Kougu dropped his hand away from his face – hoping against hope that he wouldn’t accidentally take a breath – and began to climb fervently. He couldn’t remember ever having moved this fast in his life. By the time he reached the ceiling, Kougu felt fit to burst with the breath he held. He found the handle for the trapdoor and flung it open, then scrambled through and shut it again.
Drawing in a deep, shuddering gasp, Kougu collapsed on his stomach on the spotless white floor – breathing heavily.
His breath came in deep, rattling gasps – and with the lack of oxygen in his brain, Kougu found his body unwilling to move.
Don’t give up now… He willed himself silently, This can’t go on much longer….
With these thoughts in mind, he summoned every ounce of determination he could muster, and slowly began pushing his weak body up – palms braced against the cold marble floor, and injured arm trembling violently with the effort.

“Don’t move.” A voice behind him growled, and just as Kougu was about to leap to his feet and whip around, something cold and circular was pressed against the back of his head.
It didn’t take a genius to recognize it as the nozzle of a gun.
Kougu stiffened, and remained still – holding the undignified push-up position he was now stuck in.
“This is quite the interesting development, isn’t it?” The voice asked pleasantly, and Kougu could hear a laugh in the young male’s tone.
Where had he heard this voice before…?
“This time, you’re the one pinned down, Kougu. And this time, you’re the one passing into the void.”
He heard the grin in the boy’s voice as the gun was pressed harder against his skull. “A-Anthony…?” Kougu gasped breathlessly – wishing that he could see his attacker’s face.
“I’m shocked you remember.” Anthony replied bitterly, “A monster like you, who-“
“What are you doing here?” Kougu hissed, cutting the boy off.
“What do you care?! You’re about to die!” The boy replied with an angry snarl.
“You don’t have it in you.”
“Wanna bet?!”
“Yes, I do.”
Silence…
“You are not a killer, Anthony. No matter how much you think you are, you just don’t have the heart.” Kougu informed the boy softly – slowly brushing the gun away from his head and getting to his feet. He turned, and faced the boy with deep, sorrowful blue eyes.
That golden blonde hair… Those shocking green eyes… So familiar. So sickeningly reminiscent of the friend Kougu had had all those years ago… So nostalgic of the boy he had killed.
“For your information, I’ve already killed!” The boy shouted desperately – his maddened green eyes now brimming with tears. “I’ve killed for my Shihan again and again, just so he would train me to defeat you! I won’t lose, I know I won’t! I’ll avenge my brother if it’s the last thing I do!” He whimpered desperately – tears now spilling from his eyes, “I’ve lived my whole life to kill you, and a few smooth words won’t save you now!”
He raised his gun, pointing it shakily at Kougu’s head – his small chest rising and falling in desperate panting.
Kougu met the boy’s gaze with eyes full of remorse – staring right into that emerald green gaze he remembered so well.
He recalled the soft hum of his friend’s voice in his ear… The comforting hand on his shoulder as the two of them had watched his mother'’ coffin - which he now knew had been empty – being unloaded from the hearse for the funeral.
Lastly, he remembered the sickening sight of his friend’s dying figure – run through by sword-like shards of wood – blood bubbling from his lips as he struggled to form his final, pleading words.
The betrayal in his eyes, at being killed by his own best friend.
Kougu gulped – struggling to keep his emotions in check.
Smart move, Ottosama. He acknowledged bitterly, Bring out the queen to save the king from Check…
Once again, that man was using his childhood as a weapon. But this time, Kougu was prepared… This time, he couldn’t let his guilt force him to give up.
Slowly, Kougu walked toward Anthony, his hands raised as though in surrender. The crying boy continued to point the gun at him with trembling fingers – hiccuping every now and then.
“I’m sorry for this, Anthony.” He whispered softly as he reached the boy – feeling the gun pointing directly at his heart, but not caring in the slightest.
“But it isn’t worth shattering your own soul to avenge your brother’s death. He would never want you to do that… Believe me when I say that if I honestly thought it would please him, I’d let you kill me here and now. But alas… I knew him better than that.”
With that, Kougu snatched the gun from Anthony’s hand – leaping out of the path of the bullet that fired from it. With a desperate cry, Anthony snatched for the gun – but Kougu was too quick for him.
He smashed the handle against the boy’s head, just as he had seen Jimmy do to Charlie not long ago, and closed his eyes to shut out the painful sight of the younger boy crumpling motionless to the ground.
“I’m sorry…” He murmured shakily – dropping the gun beside its fallen owner.
“I’m so sorry…”

And with that, he forced his eyes open, and walked on. Unless he was much mistaken… Behind the doors directly in front of him… The king would be waiting.
Check. Kougu thought tensely, eyebrows knitting together in a frown.
Defeating this man would be his greatest challenge of all. But if he did…
Checkmate.

Kougu drew in a deep breath, then pushed the door open. On the other end, he found a ridiculously long staircase, stretching up further than he could see.
Kougu glanced doubtfully toward his injured leg, then shrugged and began to climb – jogging up two steps at a time.
This is really getting ridiculous. He thought to himself, a disgruntled expression on his gaunt, grayish face. I should have taken that cereal Charlie offered after all. I could use the energy about now…
He sighed, then slowed his stride – plodding up the stairs one at a time.
It seemed like an eternity that he climbed those flights upon flights of stairs – but when he finally nearer the top, Kougu caught the hint of a scent that gave him new hope: Fresh air.
Soon enough, his underground expeditions would come to a halt! About time, too…
Frowning irritably, Kougu scaled the last few steps – then collapsed against the door at the top.
“Ready or not… Here I come…” He puffed quietly, and with that, he swung the door open.
Much to his disgust, Kougu suddenly found himself in an ordinary basement, of an ordinary building. More specifically: His father’s office… The very same office that he used in ‘the real world’.
After he had gone through all that effort fighting his way through the underground headquarters, he could just have gone to the address on his father’s business car instead.
With a dull and very irritable glare, Kougu stomped up the stairs leading out of the basement. His cramping leg muscles protested bitterly, and he winced at the revolting feeling of hot blood trickling from the bullet-graze on his leg, but he found himself strengthened by the fact that he was nearly at his destination.
“Your time is done!” He hissed angrily, and with that – he flung open the final door, and stumbled into his father’s office.
It was a simple room – if rather large. It had a white tiled floor, white walls and furniture made of dark wood – most likely mahogany. A decorative rug lay across the floor, and the open windows let moonlight stream in.
The foul man himself sat behind his desk – wearing a pair of glasses that he didn’t need, yet which complimented his handsome face with an intelligent charm that Kougu found downright annoying. He was sorting casually through a neat stack of papers, as though he were a plain, innocent business man no different from any other in the world.
Feeling sickened, Kougu stalked toward the man with a disgusted growl.
“So you came, boy?” The handsome man asked quietly, not even bothering to look up. Kougu stopped, hanging back suspiciously, and eyes the man with a questioning glare.
“I knew you would.” His father explained simply, finally looking up with a smile. He folded his fingers into a steeple and rested his chin on them, then stared over his glasses at his son’s pale face.
“You had some trouble getting here, I see.” The man commented with a weary sigh. “Disappointing as ever, aren’t you? None of my traps should have proved a challenge after the extensive training I gave you. You always were a failure… Such a bitter disappointment! And my own son, no less! My… I am an unfortunate man.” He sighed dramatically, shaking his head, then got to his feet and stepped around his desk to face Kougu.
“And you still have the nerve to think you can kill me… You sicken me, Gaki.” ((Note: ‘Gaki’ is ‘Brat’ or ‘Kid’ in Japanese… I think it’s anime slang… But whatever, it works. Haha!))
Kougu felt himself regress under his father’s patronizing glare, and he dropped his dark eyes to the ground – shifting uncomfortably and barely resisting the urge to fall to his knees and shine his father’s shoes with his desperate apologies.
“I don’t need your approval.” He managed finally, slowly raising his head and fixing his father with a death-stare, his muscles tensing in preparation to avoid any attacks that came.
“You’ve grown.” The man pointed out, his lips lifting in a slight smile. “I knew that girl would strengthen you…”
“Leave Charlie out of this!” Kougu hissed angrily, stepping threateningly closer to his father with a snarl on his lips, and his hand trembling violently with the longing to grab the gun from his pocket and start firing at will.
“I won’t have you befouling her pure mind with your filthy little games!” He spat bitterly – his gaze like cold steel.
“Pure, you say?” His father asked, raising his eyebrows in surprise. “But son… Surely you can see you’ve already stolen her innocence? That girl… She’s pure impurity, thanks to you.”
I don’t want to hear it! Kougu’s mind screamed, but his body fell into the trap as different words escaped his lips.
“What do you mean…?” He asked doubtfully.
“For a son of mine, you sure are stupid.” The man complained bitterly, rolling his eyes. “Don’t you see that she lusts for you?”
Kougu shifted uncomfortably, beginning to hesitantly object. “That’s-“
“It’s true.” The man’s strong voice overrode his. “You can see it in her eyes. That sinful lusting… When you fail to please her, she’ll leave you.”
“She wouldn’t-“
“Oh, but she would. Think about it, Boy! The girl hates you. If you were in her position, wouldn’t you do the same?”
A moment of silence followed as Kougu considered this, realizing with a horrified shock that it was true. A sinking sensation of despair crept into the pit of his stomach, and he found himself staring at his father in horror as the man went on – any desire to attack completely forgotten.
“She just pretends to like you so she can use you to get all that she wants. She’ll suck you dry, then leave you to bleed – just like all the rest.”
“No… No, not Charlie. She’s different!”
“Sure, son. She’s different.” He replied with a pacifying, fatherly smile.
Kougu gave a satisfied nod, his lips lifting into a slight smile – but his satisfaction did not last long.
“Aren’t we all different? But that girl – she sure is special, isn’t she? She was already a criminal when you met her. She already knew how to use people… Did you not once consider it strange that, although you’ve never before known what love is, this girl had your heart impaled on her little finger within just a few days?”
Kougu blanched, eyes widening in shock. That was true… He had thought that strange…
“It’s because she can play you like a card. Don’t you see, Kougu…? She didn’t free you from being a ‘tool’. Oh no… She merely stole you away from me and made you her own.”
Kougu shook his head rapidly, forcing his eyes shut and holding his hands over his ears.
“No… No! It’s not true! Charlie is a good person! She’s- She’s-…”
“Think about it, Kougu…” The man went on, a convincingly kind expression on his handsome face.
“Before, you killed because I asked it of you. Right now – how is this any different?”
Kougu’s eyes sprung open, and gradually widened in dawning comprehension. Then he clamped them shut, and started shaking his head again.
“No, it wasn’t Charlie! She would have told me not to go! This was my choice! All my choice!” He objected desperately.
“Or so she’d have you think. But that’s exactly why she can control you so… She uses your affections for her to make you think everything was your idea… When really, it was hers all along. Don’t you see? Everybody else will always be one step ahead of you.”
“B-But… When I met her, she-“
“Oh yes, Kougu. When you met her, she was innocent… Anthony was innocent, too, when you met him.”
Kougu’s eyes slowly widened, and he shook his head desperately, then whipped out his gun and pointed it at his father. The man’s handsome face contorted into a maddened grin, as Kougu’s shaking fingers aimed the gun at his head.
“What is the common denomintor in all these situations, Kougu?!”
“Shut up…”
“Whose fault is it that all these people have died, and that more people will continue to die?”
“SHUT UP!”
“Who killed your mother, boy? Who killed your baby sister, before she’d even graduated from infanthood?”
“It was you! It’s your fault, and we both know it! I’ll kill you! Right now, I’ll-“
“What good would it do, boy? You’ll never be free, even if I’m dead. You’re a tool – from birth to death. There will always be somebody to operate you… Don’t you see? You latch onto one person, and rely on them completely. You treat them like the sun – as though the world revolves around them. You hunger for their approval, and you’d do anything to get it…”
Kougu’s dark blue eyes stretched wider than ever before.
“You see it now, don’t you…? All that Charlie is in your life… Is a replacement for me. So go ahead, boy. Solve your problem. Kill the one to blame.”
A scream of fury escaped Kougu’s lips, and he raised his gun and began firing madly – closing his eyes as tears flooded down his face.
He heard the sound of a bullet being embedded in flesh. He heard a grunt, and the heavy thus of somebody falling to their knees.
Grim satisfaction ran through him as he smelled the meaty, metallic scent of blood – and Kougu dropped his gun, and slowly let his eyes slide open to fall upon the souvenir of his victory.

“I thought as much.” The man’s satisfied voice murmured, his lips stretching into a self-satisfied smile as he stared down at his son – curled up on a floor in a pool of his own blood.
“I was never your enemy, boy. It was you all along – and you knew it. You were just too selfish to see it.”
He snatched a hat of his coat rack and pulled it over his head, then walked out of the front door into the cool night air – his movements perfectly casual.
“Ah…” He murmured to himself, frowning in faint annoyance. “That boy got blood all over my best rug… A stain like that can’t possibly come out. I’ll have to get a new one. I’ll need a new tool, too… Perhaps a hardier one, this time. My toys always break so soon…”
He yawned tiredly, then traipsed on down the street – pleased with his night’s work.

Meanwhile, back in the office, Kougu heard his father’s voice as though from a distance, and he felt his body rapidly begin to weaken. It occurred to him suddenly that he was the one on his knees.
What…?
His strength failed, and Kougu fell to his side – hearing a faint ‘splash’, as though he was falling into a puddle of something wet. He felt it, too – soaking through his black suit until the warm dampness reached his skin.
It reeked… It reeked of death.
Wait… What?
Kougu tried to raise his head – expecting to see his father lying, shot, with his blood oozing toward Kougu to soak his clothes. But his head wouldn’t move – his neck merely twitched feebly…
WHAT?!
His vision began to fail, and he blinked repeatedly, trying to force himself to see straight. A chill crept into his bones, and he felt his muscles begin to twitch feebly.
He had felt this before. The spasms in his muscles, the failing vision, the rapid increase in his heart-rate, accompanied by the decrease in the number of breaths he could draw.
This was what it felt like to be on the brink of death.
Why…?
He had shot his father, he knew he had! He had raised the gun, and fired. He had heard the bullet hit its mark – he had felt the vibration in the floor as the man fell to his knees!
So why?!
Slowly, through a haze of blood and pain, Kougu saw the gun lying inches from his fingertips.
His father hadn’t taken it, and he had not been armed.
So how?!
Then, finally, it hit him: I did this to myself… He realized, as a sense of disbelieving wonderment stole over him. He thought back over the last few words his father had said, wondering what on earth could possibly have happened for things to end like this.
“Kill the one to blame.”
And there it was, clear as day. His father was a master of strategizing – always ten steps ahead. All the while they had been talking, he had been slowly convincing Kougu that everything was his own fault… And he had believed that filthy scumbag – again. So when it had come down to it, and he had decided to ‘kill the one to blame’, without even realizing it, he had done just that. He had dropped the blame onto his own shoulders and, without even knowing, turned the gun on himself.

Kougu managed to lower his gaze slightly, and squinted to bring the haze of crimson into focus. Not for the first time, his long, pale fingers were coated in blood – only this time it was his own. His hands clutched desperately at the deep hole in his midriff as blood pulsated horribly from the lips of the wound – soaking his clothes and pooling on the floor.
“I’m sorry…” He choked out – blood bubbling gluttonously from the corner of his mouth, and trickling sickeningly down his chin.
“I’m sorry, Charlie… I broke my promise.”
He knew she could never hear him, but he felt better for saying it. Kougu squeezed his eyes shut, and tears began to trickle from them as it finally struck him that his final act had… Failed.
“I lied… But I swear I never meant to… I never meant it to end this way.” He choked through his tears.
He drew in a shuddering breath, trying to ignore the pain in his abdomen, and summoned every ounce of strength he had left.
“I won’t let it end here.” He growled defiantly to himself, “I’m not ready to die yet!”
He forced himself to straighten into a sitting position, grimacing painfully, then ripped off his jacket ((Couldn’t think of a word for those suit things. o_0 ))
And bound it around the wound like a bandage – managing to mostly stop the bleeding.
Then, with cold and shaking fingers, he found a pressure point on his abdomen to slow the flow of blood.
Having done all he could, Kougu closed his eyes and slouched back against the wall behind him –silently praying that somebody would appear to save him from his unintended suicide.

This is not Checkmate yet, Ottosama! He thought defiantly, his lips forming just the faintest smirk. My heart is still beating, my lungs are still breathing, and there’s still a bullet in my gun. I’ll save it for you, you know. Next time… Next time I’ll be stronger. Next time, I’ll succeed…
He gulped, swallowing a sickly metallic bubble of blood that had crept up his throat – threatening to drown him.
I’m tougher than you think… I won’t die like this… Not any more. Now, I have something to live for – and nobody can take that from me.
He drew in a shuddering breath, pressed a hand firmly against his wound, then finally felt the world fading away from him.
He tried to cling to it, but it slipped from his grip like fingers slick with blood, and he felt himself falling into the void – darkness embracing him as consciousness finally escaped him, leaving him limp and motionless.

((5016 words!! *squeals* Sorry, her speech is a littly cheesy. I fail at emotional speeches -_- Since you owe me, I would like a critique too, please And no 'nice talk' if you don't like something in it ))

The look in his eyes earlier crept back into my memory, and it was then in which I realised where I'd seen them before.
Sayonara Charlie...
It was staring me in the face, practically shouting at me that it was there, and yet I'd somehow managed to ignore it completely. The look in his eyes... It was the exact same look he'd given me when he'd said goodbye the day before. The look that told me that he'd made up his mind, and that there was nothing I could do to change it.
Of course! How could I have forgotten that? If I'd remembered earlier, maybe I could have stopped him whilst I still had the chance.
Be strong Charlie... It will be okay...
Stupid! Stupid, stupid... Stupid...
But back then, because I'd been there, I managed to stop him before it was too late, and before anyone had had the chance to be hurt, or killed. But now, because I'd not been there, because he'd purposefully been avoiding me, I wasn't there to stop him.

He was going to kill his father, then he was going to die himself. And all because I hadn't been there to make him change his mind.

No...

Why hadn't I been there? Why hadn't I tried to ask him what was wrong? I could have asked him what he was thinking about, seen the lie in his face, then I'd have known exactly what was going on. But no... Being me, I'd accepted that he didn't want to talk. I'd accepted the fact that he was holding me in his arms, enjoying the warm embrace surrounding us both, the delicate feel of his fingertips caressing my skin...
Yet not once had I questioned: why?
Kougu never acted in such a way without reason , because he knew he couldn't trust himself.
Stupid...
Well, I was no use to anyone sat around, arguing with myself, was I? I had to find him.
Before it was too late.

I decided it was best that I tried following his footsteps to save time, and possibly discover clues on the way. But before I did anything too stupid, like leaping out the window, I wheeled round back to the bathroom, where my other set of clothes were hanging on the radiator. I ran forward to my jeans, desperately searching the pockets for the small business card I had received earlier, until I finally discovered the familiar feeling of something cold and smooth scratching at my fingertips and retrieved it from it's hiding place. I stared at the address for a minute or two, praying that the street name would ring a bell.
No luck.
Without even bothering to take the time to put my trainers on, I leapt out the window and darted down the street.
My feet slapped painfully over the stone tiles of the black pavement, yet they seemed nothing compared to the dull beating of my own heart, rattling furiously at my eardrums. I heard nothing other than my heavy breathing and the brushing of my jeans creating friction with each step I took. The iced air bit sorely at my bare feet, although I hardly noticed. I had one thing in my mind. Only one aim in which I had to meet.
Find Kougu.
Whatever it took.

But where was he?

I ran blindly through the neighbourhood, intertwining my route through whatever street suited my judgement, until I reached a quite crossroads, and fell to a halt.

Gasping for air, it was then when the pain of my burning lungs hit home. My knees began to quiver, the strength from my limbs drained like water through a drainpipe until I was nothing more than a hunched, trembling stranger, lost in a maze of unfamiliar territory. I was alone, desperate, panicked...
Worst of all, I had no idea where on earth I was going. Every second I stood around, Kougu was one second closer to death. But I couldn't get to him, because an address was useless if you didn't know the location. What's more, for someone who'd spent six years of their life wandering the streets, I was a stranger to this neck of the woods.
No wonder I'd never seen Kougu's house before. It was in a totally different neighbourhood to mine.
But still... It was unbelievable that I'd never been here before. Although, it may have been because it was dark...
I wheeled round, suddenly realising how late it actually was. I was stood, barefooted at a crossroads, in a t-shirt and jeans that obviously didn't belong to me. Tears were glazing my eyes, and I was acting like a baby lamb that'd lost it's mother. My best friend was about to destroy the only thing left keeping him alive. It was like destroying a life support machine, but he had a choice to live and die. Other than perhaps some mental illness, Kougu was well. If his father was the only thing keeping him alive, then I couldn't let him be killed.
No matter how much he deserved it.

But where were they?


Tom Lacey nods his head to the dull, steady pulse that thunders through his speakers, his hazel eyes curved into a positive smile. He is a middle-aged man of thirty-eight, but the years haven't quite met the whole of his face. He has little visible wrinkles, besides the faint laugh lines around his eyes, which do nothing less than highlight his positive personality and never cease to make him look like he is constantly content. His hand caresses the steering wheel as he turns a corner, resisting the temptation to hammer the acceleration pedal with the ball of his foot. The sharp pulse coming from the snare drum continues as Michael Jackson's vibrato vocals (sorry, couldn't resist Try and stay with me ) chorus through his sea blue Renault, accompanied by a strong,confident electric guitar repeating a simple riff in the background.

They told him don't you ever come around here
Don't wanna see your face, you better disappear
The fire's in their eyes and their words are really clear
So beat it, just beat it.

At the sound of his favourite song, Tom's face splits into a delightful grin, and he begins to join in, his flat tone screeching an octave higher than his voice box could really take.

You better run, you better do what you can
Don't wanna see no blood, don't be a macho man
You wanna be tough, better do what you can
So beat it, but you wanna be bad?

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it.

His head nods enthusiastically as the song continues to the instrumental, and for a moment he has a great urge to let go of the wheel and dance about with his air guitar like some drunk teenager at an eighteenth birthday party. Instead, he taps a rhythm similar to that of the drum kit and hums along to the effective guitar solo. Damn... he loves this song. (I do too, just not quite as much as he does...XD)

(Aaand back to past tense )
However, he was suddenly caught off track as a dark, worried figure caught his eye from further down the street. He frowned, turning the volume down instantly and rolled to a halt. It was a girl, he could tell that much. She looked worried... In fact, no. Frantic, she was. On the merge of tears., too. Whatever was troubling her, it had to be important. But either she was looking for something or someone, or she was lost.
He decided on the latter.
“D'you need a hand, love?” he asked curiously, rolling his window down. The fact that she spun sharply to face him told him she was on the edge. The poor thing looked terrified. Her eyes widened slightly as she saw him, but his arrival didn't seem to alarm her as much as he'd thought.
“Yes!” She said quickly, jogging over to him. Well... He'd definitely won her trust quickly. Hadn't her parents ever told her to be aware of strangers? Still, he wasn't planning on doing anything to her, and his sister had always told him he was as soft as a feather pillow.
It was then in which she realised she had nothing on her feet. Was she a runaway? Had she been mugged? He doubted it, since many knew that nowadays, when in such an area, when you were mugged the thieves generally didn't just take something then leave you be.
No, the girl was fine – physically, that is. So what the hell was wrong with her?
“Yes, err...” She glanced at something in her palm, then handed it to him without a moment's hesitation. “D'you know where this is?”
He stared at the business card, his pale brow furrowing quizzically. Well, the street name didn't exactly ring a bell, so he'd have been lying if he'd said he knew where it was. Slowly, he shook his head. “I'm afraid not. But...” He turned to the right, just enough to see the small SatNav fixed beside the steering wheel. It had been turned off, as it wasn't needed when he lived so close. Still, the thing had it's uses. “I'm sure I can find it.” I pressed the small, circular button at the top of the small, thin box and waited a few seconds for it to turn on. He then glanced back at the card, memorizing the address before typing into the 'Destination' section at the bottom of the screen. Instantly a map filled the screen, showing him his route, and how long it would take him to get there.
Wow... That was a complicated road, even though the actual building wasn't that far away...
It would probably not be too far on foot, but it was far too late out, and he knew well of the dangers of the streets at night. Besides, the girl looked far too vulnerable to be out so late on her own. He pointed to the screen. “Okay, according to this, it would take around ten minutes to get from here to there in a car, depending on traffic or...” He stopped, studied the empty streets around him and came to the conclusion that traffic would be an unlikelihood he wasn't going to put his money on. “Depending on what's about.” He corrected himself, looking back over to her with a thoughtful shrug. She was leaning into the car now, staring with wide, desperate eyes as the screen zoomed back to the start position. With a jerk she straightened, looking back towards the road before him and swallowed what looked like tears.
“Thank you!” she said quickly, beginning to jog down the street. His brow furrowed in concern, and he shifted the joystick(or whatever they're called ) and rolled the car on after her. She seemed stirred as he appeared beside her, but he refused to back down.
“Hey, wait a minute. D'you want a lift?”
She skidded to a halt, eyeing him suspiciously. She had all the reason not to trust him, but in his defence, he had wasted a few minutes of his time in order to help her. At the short silence that followed, he decided he'd better explain himself. “It's dark out. You'll catch your death out here. Come on, love.” He sounded a little creepy, he realised with a jolt. Of course she wasn't going to believe him if he carried on being too caring. He shrugged, gesturing to the SatNav beside him. “I've got he address in, now. I might as well take you.” There. That should do the trick.
The suspicious slowly sank from her face, and the anxiety ran it's way back into her eyes. She opened the passenger seat and slammed it closed behind her.
“Thanks.” She mumbled, forcing a quick smile as they began down the road.


He started conversation quickly. “So... Mind if I ask you something?” He said, not taking his concentrated eyes off the road.
I shrugged. To be honest, I wasn't really in the mood for a questionnaire; I'd had too much to worry about already. “Sure.” I said flatly, staring out the window.
“This place you're going to... You know it's an office, right?”
“Yeah.” I turned to him briefly, a blank expression carefully put on my face. I couldn't show any form of weakness to a stranger, even if that included anger of frustration. I had no idea who he was. But I had to put my trust in him, because I didn't really have much choice. Just like someone else we know... Scrunching my eyes, I blocked the memory of my promise to myself about kougu's father. I didn't need that now. I knew that wherever we were going would take double the time to get there on foot as it would in a car. I didn't have time to doubt my judgement. Kougu was going to die if I didn't get there soon. “So?”
He glanced at me, his eyes flicking down to my bare feet, then back up to my face. He seemed to be debating on whether or not to tell me, and opened his mouth to speak. “You... Y-you... I-It's...” He sighed, glanced down at my feet, then shook his head and brought his attention back to the road. “Never mind.”
It's an office. I'm filthy. I look like a runaway hermit.
Even though he didn't say them, I knew exactly what words were running through his head. I couldn't have cared less, to be honest. I knew I looked like some homeless person that had just been mugged. I knew I probably looked insane to him. But my best friend's life was on the line, here. I had bigger things to worry about than what I looked like.
He turned a corner. More houses. No sign of an office anywhere.
“So...”
I resisted the temptation to roll my eyes. Why was he talking to me? I didn't need this. I got into that car for only one reason: to save time. I didn't even want to get to know him, only hitch a ride so that I could hopefully narrow the chances of finding Kougu dead in his father's office by getting there as early as possible. I didn't even want to get to know this guy.
“Have I seen you before?”
On the Wanted posters, probably. “No. I doubt it.” I answer flatly, twirling a long strand of hair between my fingers.
“Hm.” He made a faint noise under his breath, almost as if he was searching the memories to see whether I popped into any of them. “I swear I have. Somewhere...”
How would I know?
“What school do you go to?”
The questions were beginning to irritate me. I gnawed on the clump hair in my hand and clasped it tightly. “I don't go to school.”
“Don't you?” He sounded surprised, then he glanced quickly down at my feet and seemed to make sense of the fact. “How come?”
You know the answer, I thought darkly. Don't ask a question when you already know the answer. “I can't afford it.”
“Okay...” He said slowly, regarding me with a cock of his head. “Well, what school did y-”
“Can we hurry up?” I asked, if only to stop him from bringing up the subject of primary school, and looked up at him with a pleading gaze. “Please?”
He looked at me, spotted the desperation and closed his mouth, turning round another corner.
“Turn right at Feildhead Drive” The mechanical women's voice hummed through the SatNav's tiny speakers. I took a moment to stare at the peculiar, orange screen, watching as the tiny arrow turned down a small, grey road just as we did. How did it know where we were? Did the car have some sort of sensor on it? Was there someone spying on us?
Spying. Ha. Funny.
Maybe I was right. Maybe I had just gone insane.
Bang.
“What the-” The male's body tensed as gunshots fired into the quiet, night air. My head jolted up.
Bang... Bang bang... BANG.
They were coming from up ahead.
My eyes widened, and I grabbed the side of the door to get ready to run out as soon as we reached the office. A dark figure in a long, business-like coat and hat was strolling down the street, his face – although partially consumed by the shadows of the passing buildings – had a rather smug look about it, like he was pleased with himself. As the car passed him, I realised with a gasp in horror that it was Kougu's father. He was walking away from where the gunshots had been, but he was hardly running for his life.
Kougu, on the other hand, had not emerged.
No...
“Were they gunshots?” The male began to panic beside me, his hands on the wheel beginning to quiver like leaves in the wind. His weren't the only ones.
“You have reached your destination.” The SatNav voice reminded me. Huh, as if I needed reminding.
“I have to go,” I said quickly, opening the door whilst the car was still in motion. It swung outwards, and the male ended up having to emergency brake the car to stop the door from snapping from it's hinges. I leapt out the car, spinning back to him. Even in such a situation, I couldn't just leave without thanking him for not killing me.
Or worse.
“Thank you. Er...”
Now he really was staring at me as if I'd lost my mind. He scrunched his eyes closed, trying to clear his head. "Tom.” He said. “Tom Lacey. But wait a minute, if there's a guy with a gun in there, if they're ready to shoot...”
“He won't shoot me.” I said simply, turning away from the car. “Thanks for the ride, Tom.”
And with that, I dashed into the building.

I was almost blinded by the lightness of the crystal white walls, the clean smell that immediately made me want to be sick. To think such a man – a man that had treated his son so shockingly, who called them a 'tool'. It made me sick.
I then realised Kougu was laying among the disgustingly white wall, and sank to his aid. He had managed to prop himself up in a sitting position by the wall, but his eyes were closed. My eyes scanned his wounds, several blurry red splodges scattered over his middle. His shirt, once white, was now stained all over the front with a sickly pattern of blood red smudges, and his face had gone a deathly pale. His body was limp, and when I sank to my knees beside him and grabbed his hand, he did not react.
A bad sign.
“Kougu?” My voice shook, desolation causing tears to build up in my eyes. “Kougu, it's me. It's Charlie.”
Nothing.
I shook my head, gently bringing his hand to my face. And the amount of times I'd wanted him to do that himself... “Wake up... Please...”
I grasped his hand, breathing a hot breath onto his skin, trying to get the blood to flow back through his flesh. But it was cold. Stone cold.
What the hell was I supposed to do? I'd never had any medical training, I didn't even know if he was even alive...
“Tom!” I wailed, praying that he would still be within hearing distance. Please let him come, I begged. Please let him have the guts to come in... “Tom!”
Rubber tires screeched against the tarmac outside, a car door slammed shut, footsteps thundered inside. Tom ran in, eyes wide in alarm. I must have shouted him rather loudly, because he looked like he'd just had the scare of his life.
“What's wr-” Then his eyes saw Kougu, and he froze. “Jesus...” he whispered, kneeling down beside me. He took Kougu's hand from mine and checked his wrist for a pulse. He sat stiff for a few painfully long seconds, before bending down and hovered his cheek over Kougu's mouth. My heart raced. What was he doing?
“Tom, wh-”
“Trust me. I'm a doctor.” He began to mumble something, but the words were so quiet and complex I had no idea what he was talking about. I was still staring at him, silently questioning my luck. Was that really a coincident?
“Really?” I asked, surprised.
He snorted. “No. I've been training as a paramedic for a few years. But I've always wanted to say that.” I rolled my eyes. Well, paramedic was alright. At least he knew what he was doing.
Too bad I didn't.

After a few more moments, he sat up and began to dart his gaze over Kougu's bloody figure. Tears spilled down my hot cheeks, so much so that my eyes had gone raw. If Kougu was dead, I didn't know what I'd do. There were so many things I had planned for us to do together. Hadn't he realised I meant every stinkin' word I'd told him outside Antonio's carpark? 'I'm going to show you what you're missing'. I hadn't even got that far. I'd got him to eat... That was it. There were so many things...
It was then in which I noticed he had dressed into a suit, one which would have been spotless when he'd first got it out.
The box. Of course!
So that had been what was in there. Oh God... He'd even put on some Italian shoes. He really had dressed for the occasion of killing his father.
And to die.
But what had happened?
Oh Kougu... What has that man done to you?

Tom began to fumble around Kougu's blood-stained shirt to his wounds, scattered over his skinny torso. I could only just make out a few of his words: “Gall Bladder... Colon... Abdominal wall... Duodenum...” Not that I had any idea what any of those were. Eventually, he straightened up and began gently slapping Kougu's sheet white cheek.
“What's wrong?” I asked fearfully.
He turned to me. “He's been shot.”
Fan-bloody-tastic. Was that it? Was that all he'd found out? “Well? Is he alive?”
“Well, his heart's not much more than a murmur,” Tom said , tapping Kougu's cheek with his palm once again. “But it's there. We need to keep it that way. I'm calling for an ambulance.”
“No,” I said, and with the look of surprise on his face, I quickly thought of an excuse. “H-he hates hospitals. Besides, he's practically got his own at home.” I looked down at my hands. They were trembling. There was no way I'd be any help to anyone in this state. I looked up at Tom. “We need to get him in the car.”
“No.”
I frowned. “Why not?”
“We can't move him.” Tom said sternly, looking me in the eye. “He's got too many puncture wounds. If we move him, too much blood will escape his body and he'll be dead in minutes. I'm not risking it.”
I gritted my teeth. Didn't he get it? “If we stay here much longer, we'll be dead if anyone finds us here.” I hissed. Perhaps I was wrong. Perhaps I was overreacting. But one thing I knew for certain, if we stayed there long enough for Kougu's father to find us, we'd face nothing but grief and pain from then on, and Kougu would have to relive the nightmares he tried so hard to forget. I wasn't risking that.
Tom sighed, squatting down and resting his elbows on his knees. He thought for a moment, before finally looking at me with a stern gaze. “Fine. I'll do you a deal. If you can get him concious and keep him that way, I'll help you move him into the car. Deal?”
I nodded.
“Right. Now, whatever you do, do not move him. Especially not his legs. Got that?”
“M-hmm.”
“I'll put pressure on his wounds to stop the bleeding. You try and wake him.” He shuffled round beside me and placed his palms on top of each other and linked his fingers. He then placed his knotted hands onto Kougu's stomach and began to press down. I turned to Kougu's pale face, wondering what the hell I was expected to do. I'd tried everything I could. Everything...
Tom must have sensed my hesitancy, and nudged me gently. In was odd: we'd become strangely close in the little time we'd known each other.
“Talk to him.” he muttered softly.
I looked up at him, feeling helpless. “I-it won't work...”
“Whilst his heart is working, so is his brain. Believe me, he can hear you.” At the doubtful look on my face, he sighed and pressed firmer over Kougu's torso. “What's his name?”
“Kougu.” I answered.
He nodded. “Kou-” He cut himself, crossed his eyebrows, then turned to me. “What?”
Sighing, I shook my head. “Never mind.” I shuffled round to his shoulders, daring myself to stroke his thick, silky black hair like I'd always wanted to. My legs crossed over one another, and I gazed at his peaceful expression, his tear-stained skin. I gently ran my fingertips over his hairline, taking a moment to enjoy the luxury of being so close to his face.
“Talk to him,” Tom repeated.
And that was exactly what I did.
“D'you want to know a secret?” I asked Kougu gently, delicately brushing away a strand of hair that had fallen over his eyes. “I love you.”
It was now when I realised I was crying so hard, the words came out as nothing much more than a gurgle. But I didn't care. If Kougu could hear me, I wanted him to know exactly what was going on in my head. (Prepare for cheesy speech ) “Ever since you came into my life, I've felt complete. I've felt safe for the first time in six years. And it wasn't until last night when we kissed that I realised... I didn't want you to leave me. Kougu, you mean so much...” I swallowed, waiting for a few tears to roll down my cheeks before resuming. “I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I've seen your kindness and your strength. I've seen the best and the worst of you. And now I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You are a marvel.
“You are as ancient as the tallest mountains, you are as new as a newborn babe. You're as fresh as a clear water stream and as pure as the driven snow. (Don't ask, it's a saying. I don't even know what 'driven snow' is o.0) You're special because, although you refuse to agree, you are the only one in this world that would have even dared to take me in that morning out on the street. You knew I was guilty, yet you didn't just look at the 'what', you considered the 'why'. You are the only person that would have stood up to those policemen, Jimmy and Antonio.
“I love you... Kougu, I love you more than life itself. You took the weight of the world off my shoulders, and for that, I'm grateful. I owe you more than words could say. And I mean this from the bottom of my heart: I would dig my way down to hell and back if it meant I could have just one more day with you. If I could have you hold me one more time like you did, kiss me like you did...” My vision was blurred by the thick, salty tears that cascaded down my cheeks, but I could still make out the clear cut of his lower jaw, his slightly hollow cheeks bones, his beautiful, peaceful expression. He looked so perfect... Now the only thing left to see was his eyes, hidden behind his tightly closed eyelids. “And I despise myself for being to damn selfish. I know all you want to do is die, and I'm sat here guilt tripping you. I... I just-...”
Breath. Swallow.
“I didn't tell you this before because I thought you loving me would be enough to give you something worth living for. I thought it would be enough to persuade you that not all emotions were bad. But I was wrong.
“I just can't let you go... yet. You have to give me time. Maybe give you a chance to live your life before you throw it away over someone like your father. I meant every word about showing you what you're missing. Just... Give me a chance to change your mind. Please...”
I closed my eyes, letting the tears soak the neckline of my large t-shirt. What use was saying all those things, when I didn't have the nerve to tell him in person? How cowardice was that? I wiped my cheek roughly with my hand and hugged my knees, feeling Tom's hot gaze burning into the side of my skull. I carefully ignored him. I didn't want to explain anything to him at that moment.
Wake up... I begged silently. Wherever you are, wake up. I need you, now. I need you more than ever before. I want you so much, it hurts. Just... Wake up. Please wake up...

((Don't get excited, I haven't posted yet.

Just got to send a link to this song. I love it. Do listen - it's not as heavy as most of my music.
Link))

((Back to short posts... Haha! I can't believe it was only 1600 words. I was hoping for more... But I think it's fine, since it's kinda a 'transition post', if you get my drift.

I mean...

Wake up. Speak. Stand. Sit. Speak. - 1600 words. o_0

Hehe! XD So I forgive myself!
Anyway, I can't wait for your reply, as always! Nhaaa, I love what a 'bond' these two have. It's such a 'deeper' sort of relationship than what usually develops in RPs... Polo finds it very cute.

...

LMAO!!!! Nutty was sleeping on my computer, and she just squirmed, almost fell off, and pulled my mouse off the desk!! XD I caught her flailing bottom and pushed it back onto the computer, though - never fear. Hehe! *Giggles* My kitty is so funny. XD Always sleeps where she can't fit...
That had to be shared. :3

I'll shut up and leave you to read the post now. ))

It’s a lie. Kougu thought to himself, There is no light. ‘Don’t go towards the light’, they always say… But where is the light? All I see is darkness.
He tried opening his eyes, but the lids refused to stir. They would not even grant him so much as a feeble twitching. His body remained still – so perfectly relaxed, it was almost sickening. He could not move at all… It was as though his mind was no longer linked to his body.
Is this death? He wondered with a dull curiosity, Has my spirit already left my body, and this is all that remains? If this is so… I don’t like it. I- I don’t like it at all!
Panic darted through him, and Kougu struggled desperately to rouse his slumbering body – thoughts raging wildly through his mind.
Am I doomed to spend an eternity in this darkness?! Existing in mind, but not in matter? To continue ‘being’ for all time, yet never feeling, never moving, never sensing? All I have for company are my thoughts. The selfsame thoughts I sought endlessly to escape.
Death… All I ever wished for… Is this it? Is this truly… All there is, after life? No. No, I don’t like it! I don’t want this… I don’t want to die… I want to live.
Hopelessness fell over him like a cloud, and he felt as though he were shrinking – becoming smaller and smaller in the endless expanse of nothingness that had suddenly become his everything. His entire world…
Please… Please… Let me live. I’m not ready to die. Please!
He didn’t even know to whom he was pleading. Clearly, if this was the end, there was no God… No Heaven, no Hell, no rebirth, no afterlife. So why… WHY was he pleading?! Why did it hurt so much…?
Wait.
Wait…
Was that… Pain?
Thud
Yes… Pain. He felt it. It burned like fire through his body.
Thud.
His body…? Yes… Yes! He had not yet left it. He felt the pain in his leg where the bullet had skimmed him. His arm, too… And his midriff, where the pain had become so intense that it had seemed to drown out all else. Ah, that pain! How he relished it. It was the one thing that told him life had not yet forsaken him, and for that, he loved it. The pain was, as always, a faithful ally.
Thud.
So then that was…
Thud.
His heart?
Thud.
It was still beating. Weakly, but he felt it – thudding on and on in a regular rhythm, determinedly holding him to life. Binding him with fragile ties to all he had suddenly decided to hold dear.
I’m alive! He realized, with a powerful thrill of relieved ecstasy. It’s not over yet!
Hope sparked in him like a flame, and gradually, Kougu began to feel – little by little – a bit more.
Behind the darkness of his eyelids, the whiteness of the room shone brightly, gradually paling the black he saw to a dim red. He could smell, too. The room smelled familiar… The scent of that familiar cleanser lingered – but even more powerful, was the scent of blood. His blood.
Then, finally, he began to hear as well. The ground vibrated as feet thundered across it – the sound of the heavy footfalls reverberating through his head.
Somebody is here. He noted with vague acceptance. He did not really have any feelings on this matter. Not relief, not fear, merely acceptance.
As though from a distance, he heard voices. They were loud, yet they echoed so much that they slurred together into a low din – humming noisily in his ears. He struggled to make out the words, but it was as though he heard them from underwater. It struck him that one of the voices was familiar, and the other not, but he could not quite put his finger on who the owners might be.

Then he heard it… From amongst the loud, unbearable humming – a gentle whisper entered his mind, ringing clear as a bell.
“D'you want to know a secret?” That was Charlie’s voice. He recognised it now… And suddenly, his feelings were not quite so dull. Emotion hit him with the force of a tidal wave as memories from the past week washed over him. He felt relief, guilt, regret, fear, concern, anger and so many more inexplicable emotions that he could not even label them. They stabbed like daggers at his heart – making any physical pain he felt seem pitiful by comparison – yet still, one emotion stood out clearer than any other, and it burned more than everything else combined.
Love. He felt such love for Charlie at that moment, that it hurt so much he feared it might kill him.
Then her whisper broke through his thoughts once more, and those three words stunned him into numbness.
”I love you.”
He had so longed to hear those words. His whole life, he had wanted desperately for somebody to love him… Now, it had finally happened, and he felt…
He felt…
Nothing.
I guess I knew all along. He reflected, feeling the slightest twitch in his lips as they tried to respond to the desire to smile. I didn’t need to hear it, after all. Just that she’s here… That I have Charlie by my side… That’s more than enough for me.
A sense of peace stole over him, and Kougu suddenly felt more blissfully content than ever before in his life. As Charlie resumed speaking, her words gradually became clearer – yet his attention soon began to wander.
He had heard enough… He didn’t want to hear the pain in her voice. All he wanted was to stand up, embrace her gently, and whisper to her that everything was going to be all right. That he would never leave her, even in death.
Open your eyes. He demanded of himself – prodding viciously at his body with a lance of thought. Open them!
His eyes remained shut, but the lids twitched feebly, and Kougu continued trying as Charlie’s voice washed over him from far, far away. The battle seemed endless – but just as he had begun to think he would not succeed, Charlie’s voice sounded closer – and he heard her final words with full consciousness.
“I just can't let you go... yet. You have to give me time. Maybe give you a chance to live your life before you throw it away over someone like your father. I meant every word about showing you what you're missing. Just... Give me a chance to change your mind. Please...”
Drawing up all his strength, Kougu blocked out the pain and let his pale, bloodstained lips curve into a smile.
“Baka.” He whispered weakly – his lips barely moving. “Who’s going anywhere?” Finally, he managed to open his eyes – raising his head slightly to meet Charlie’s eye. “You’re crying.” He informed her, his heart sinking at the sight of her tears. “Surely you didn’t really think I’d die from this…?”
Slowly gaining strength now, Kougu managed a reassuring smile – and then his awareness broadened, and he sensed the presence of somebody else.
Yes… The other voice. He remembered with a jolt.
Panic spiked through him as he suddenly noticed the hands pressing over his wound, and Kougu leaped back against the wall – adrenaline slaughtering any weakness he still felt.
“Who’s he?!” Kougu demanded in a nearly hysterical voice – scrambling to a standing position and pushing himself back against the wall – desperately casting around for an escape route, though all seemed blocked.
Pain lanced through him, and Kougu doubled over with a snarl, clutching at his bleeding stomach.
“Y-You can’t b-be here.” He stammered – shaking his head violently and speaking to both Charlie and the stranger at once. “I- I’ll- “ Choking on his words, he coughed painfully, and blood burst from between his lips – spattering the floor in a gory, crimson pattern.
Feeling suddenly weak again, his legs buckled, and he clutched at the wall for support to keep himself from falling down.

I can’t do this alone. He realised with a jolt, as his vision began going hazy again. I… I have to rely on them. I’ve got no other choice… It’s that – or die. I don’t want to die… Not any more.
Slowly, he began sliding down the wall – leaving a bloody trail shining brightly on the icy whiteness. “S-Sorry.” He managed breathlessly – falling into a sitting position once more, and struggling to maintain consciousness. “I- I-…” He grabbed a gasp of oxygen, then resumed speaking. “I’ll just- I’ll be okay, I think…”
This time, Kougu was not referring to his own wellbeing.
“Charlie.” He glanced toward her, and his eyes softened slightly. Managing to relax just a little, he felt his shoulders drop an inch as some tension left them. “I… Can never thank you enough…” He watched her a while longer. He wanted to tell her that he loved her. Just in case… But the strange man’s presence stayed his tongue. He couldn’t do it… He just couldn’t express his feelings in front of others. “The gun.” He said, instead, “Will you bring it…? Just in case? I’m… Not strong enough right now.” Trusting that she would know what he meant, Kougu stared at her a moment longer – wanting to hold her image in his sight for as long as he could, and savour it. He had been so terrified… Thinking he would never again see that face. Now, it was difficult to look away – but finally, he managed.
“And, uh…” He mumbled, glancing uncertainly toward the man hovering near Charlie. He seemed to have a kind face… This made Kougu suspicious, but he supposed he would just have to trust the man for now. “Thanks… Uh….?” He trailed off, waiting for the man’s name – yet at the same time, not really listening. He was in pain, and it was difficult to cling to consciousness when he was still bleeding.
He would be okay, though. He would be fine. Because Charlie was here… Because he had promised not to leave her.

((Wow, that's a good song o.0 *steals song for iPod*

And it's definitely fine, Polo. Of course it's short compared to your last post, but even mine looked tiny, and mine was 5000 words long Plus, I didn't really give him much to work with, other than a blabby speech Besides, I luffed it all the same!

Nawww, so do I And to say it was only, like, 10 days or so ago since they first met
Well, it's probably less, but it's 10 in my head XD

Haha! What a noob Bless her. Sid sleeps in boxes, the bedroom landing, worktops, tables and fairly often - steps. The third from the bottom to be precise. It's annoying too, because he stretches out and doesn't let you pass so you have to skip a step, then dodge his claws before they shred your feet... o.0
It must be cats in general. They're all noobs

Okay, I won't be able to start the post tonight, since I have FAR too much music work to be getting on with, but I'll start it tomorrow, and I have all of wednesday off, then I break up on Friday. OMW, it really is a wonder how you manage to think something up so quick, and still remain to keep it so amazing. You put me to shame
Just curious, have you got any twisty ideas for the next day? Or however long we're waiting for something else to happen? I'm trying to think of another, and I've got a scenario for Antonio, but I just realised I missed out a small chunk that explained what they did when they both woke up...
Meh, I'll write it up later ))

((Gosh... Your OOC post looks almost as long as my RP post! LMAO!

Hehe! 5000, 7000... Look at us. We're crazy, as always! XD *Claps* That blabby speech was AMAZING! And it was actually too much to work with. O.o Hence - I covered my fluff's ears and told him not to listen, else he would have had an annoying comment for every single word. Haha! It was perfect. *Glomps*

Yes, I agree, 10... I just tend to think 'A week'. It's easiest that way. XD Gosh, they are busy, aren't they? O.o Haha!

Naaaw, classic kitty! He sounds like such a character! Adorable.

Poor overworked Dreameh. That's no good... The work must go AWAY! Polo needs to RP. XD Still - AMPED to have you on holiday! ... Just when I'm probably going back to the Hellhole. *Dies*
I don't have any twists in mind yet... XD ))

((Got another song that kinda reminds me of the RP, and that I think Dreambug will really like. Ten Years - Rev Theory ))

((Okay, I am soooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry, Polo. Firstly because it was late, and also because it's horrible. I didn't really plan it, and my brain's just gone on lazy mode -_- About yesterday, I managed to write about 1000 words, and I was sat infront of the computer for four hours, just staring at the keyboard and reading previous posts to try and up my motivation. Guess what? It didn't work. Then my dad wanted the computer, and I was nowhere near finishing. But on the up side, I'm getting a laptop with internet access in September, so I won't have that problem.

Please do excuse the horrible quality o.0))

“Baka.” A faint whispering grabbed my attention, and my eyes flicked open at the sound. Funny – I could have sworn the word had come from Kougu's lips. He was the only one in the room that would usually use such a word, anyway. But when I looked down at his lips – his delicate, bloodless lips – they didn't stir.
Oh, who was I kidding? He wasn't talking. I was imagining it. I was only hearing it because it was what I wanted to hear.
Pathetic.
“Who's going anywhere?”
I closed my eyes once again, scrunching them so tightly the darkness turned into a fuzz of colour like on a broken TV screen. Go away... I begged. I couldn't afford to let my mind play tricks on me at such a time. Why couldn't it let me in peace, just this once? Go away...
“You're crying.”
Okay. So my mind knew that. But why was the voice so much clearer than before? Hesitantly, I relaxed my eyes and let them draw open in their own time. If I was imagining this, I would want to know, before I said anything outloud and looked like a total mad child.
For a few brief moments my vision was blurred, but after a couple of strong blinks, Kougu's pale face became fully visible through my tears. I sniffed. For the first time in a long time, I could see his eyes. Well... not quite. They looked like dark, bottomless pits in his hollow skull. But I could have sworn they were closed before...
Oh. He blinked.
Okay, so I hadn't imagined it. My heart lurched in hope. You're alive...
“Kougu...” Oh dear... I probably looked an absolute mess. I could tell by the look of his face that he was concerned, but I was far too relieved to care. My hands began to tremble, and I sat back, remembering that he would probably need more air than most people.
“Surely you didn’t really think I’d die from this…?”
Feeling slightly stupid, I let a relieved giggle leave my tear-soaked lips. Well, he couldn't have exactly blamed me for worrying about him. I mean, how many times had he been shot? Three? Four? There was so much blood, it wouldn't have surprised me if there were another couple of bullets embedded somewhere in the crimson mess. But hey, I was certainly relieved to see him again, alive. Had I not had the common sense, and the realisation that Tom was sat right beside me, I would have kissed Kougu. Perhaps not on the lips, but I would have kissed him. It was almost as if I craved him: his warmth, his strength, his soft touch. I relished the fact that I'd finally been able to enjoy being around him without having to worry about what he might do. I dared myself to stroke his hair again, but a sudden jerk of his movement stopped me. Eyes widening, he scrambled to his feet – despite the enormity of his wounds, which he had apparently forgotten about – and propped himself against the wall. At first, I didn't realise why. Then my eyes found Tom, who was looking rather mortified that his 'patient' had recovered so quickly, but probably also wondering what the hell he had done wrong to make Kougu fear him so eminently. Of course, Kougu wasn't exactly the sort of person you just met on the street.
Okay, that was a poor choice of words.
I'd met him on the street...
But the point still stood. Kougu was certainly not the sort of person anyone could understand straight away. Even I didn't know all that much about him. But I did know that he was a difficult person to 'get'.
Tom stared at him blankly, hands still frozen in the same position they'd been in when they'd been pressed over Kougu's stomach. Blood splashed from his fingertips, but he didn't seem to notice.
“Who's he?!” Kougu exclaimed in a frenzy, eyes darting around the room, presumably for a way out. Immediately I was on my feet, just in time to catch him before he sank back down weakly onto his knees. I wasn't concentrating, nor caring much about his stutters, but I could pick up a gruff 'You can't be here' just as he began to choke.
I managed to dodge the blood. Tom, on the other hand, wasn't quite so lucky. He suffered with ebony blotches all over his teenager-like, denim jeans. But he didn't stir.
Instead, he slowly arose onto his knees, flicked the blood off his fingers – he was obviously used to being smothered in it – and looked up at Kougu calmly, although his eyes looked like those of a wildlife handler that had just accidentally let a deadly viper loose.
Steve Irwin came to mind.
“It's alright,” Tom assured him. “Listen, Kougu, I'm a doctor. I'm just here to help.” His eyes flicked to Kougu's abdominal wound. “You've been in the wars, mate.”
It was a statement, not a question.
If it hadn't already been done, Kougu was calmed by Tom's soft tone and obediently sank back into a sit. I ignored the mark he'd left on the wall due to this action.
“S-sorry.” he stuttered weakly, almost breathless from the little energy he'd had to dig out of his body and use up on the very task of speaking that single word. I’ll just- I’ll be okay, I think…”
Liar, I thought secretly.
“Charlie.” My attention was gripped suddenly at the mention of my name. I looked up at Kougu questioningly. “I… Can never thank you enough…”
I rolled my eyes, finally looking away from him. There was no time for 'Thank you' s in the state he was in. Whether he wanted to hide the pain was his choice, but I wasn't going to hang about when he was in such critical condition. Tom's previous words rang through my head.
If we move him, too much blood will escape his body and he'll be dead in minutes...
If we didn't get Kougu sorted as soon as possible, if Tom's predictions were correct, Kougu would be dead in minutes.
I wasn't going to stand by and let that happen.
“You can thank me later.” I said, wiping my face away roughly with my fingers. I was done with the tears, now. Tears and regrets did nothing but give us excuses to waste time. Kougu would be lucky if he even had much time. “But now, we need to get you sorted.”
He stared at me for a moment, then began to speak again. This time, the subject changed.
“The gun.” He said simple, “Will you bring it…? Just in case? I’m… Not strong enough right now.”
The gun? That ruddy thing? Why did he want me to bring it? All it had done was cause his bloodshed, my worry and a huge lump of heartbreak. No... No. I wasn't going to be seen dead with that thing in my possession. Why didn't want me to? Why did he dare?
Our eyes met for a brief second, and suddenly it all made sense.
Oh.
Oh...

Well, I still wasn't going to do it.

I crossed my arms stubbornly, refusing to budge. I was ready to argue, I was ready to disagree with him. But one thing I was not going to do, I was not going to take that stupid, ugly weapon home with me. If I saw another one of those things pointed at anyone again that day – or that week – I would probably wouldn't be able to resist the temptation to kill them myself. I was sick of guns. Sick of them...

“Thanks… Uh….?” Kougu was talking to Tom, now. It surprised me he even managed, after his first reaction to Tom being even in the room. Perhaps that was partly my fault... But hey, in my defence, I wasn't even sure whether he was going to wake up or not. If it hadn't been for Tom, he may not have in the first place.
“Oh, I'm Tom. Tom Lacey.” Tom spoke pleasantly, and even rose his hand to shake Kougu's. Then, in mid-flight, he spotted the blood still smothered over his palm and thought better of it, wrapping his fingers into a fist and dropped his hand back to his side. It also seemed that he had sensed Kougu was not really the touchy-feely type, and his boundaries were best not to be pushed. If anything, the faster Kougu's heart raced, the more blood he was going to lose. I didn't have to be a paramedic to know that.
“Listen, Kougu. I'm a doctor.” Tom said calmly, almost as if he were talking a child.
So he'd picked up on Kougu's personality quicker than I had, then
But again with the 'doctor'?
“You're seriously wounded, you know that. You've been shot near some vital organs, and I'm not sure what internal damage there is in there.” He gestured to Kougu's stomach. “But what I do know - well, I'm certain of -is that you're very unlikely to survive if I just leave you, now. I have a first aid kit in the back of the car. Just let me bandage you up and give the two of you a lift home, then I'll leave you be.”
My eyes found the gun, sat innocently in the middle of the room near to where Kougu had been sat, and nailed my gaze on the weapon, unblinking. The amount of problems that thing had caused me in the past week...
Tom glanced at me to check for my approval, then followed my gaze with a frown to the gun on the floor. There was a brief pause as he put the pieces together in his mind, and slowly turned back to Kougu, puzzlement causing what little wrinkles he had on his brow to furrow dramatically. Of course, when we had found him, the gun had been sat not too far from Kougu's hand ,and it was unlikely that someone else put it there.
“You shot... Yourself?” He asked in bewilderment, his eyes widening slightly. Of course, he didn't know Kougu like I did. He didn't know what all this was about. All he saw was a patient on the verge of death.
Of course, he didn't think that now.
Now, he saw a suicidal patient on the verge of death. By the look on his face, that changed things. Not much, but it did change things. He looked... surprised, to say the least. But nothing compared to the fury I felt towards that small, black object in the centre of the room. My fists clenched tightly by my side and, forgetting completely about the two men beside me, I stormed between them and snatched the gun off the floor and wheeled round to face them both. Tom turned to me, looking at me as if I'd gone insane.
My eyes flicked from him, then Kougu, then to the gun. I held it loosely by it's point and waved it pointedly. “If I see one more gun....” I growled, laving the threat lingering in the air as I stepped past them again, over Kougu's stretched out legs and outside to the first wheely bin I passed. I opened the lid with one hand and tossed the gun loudly into the dark pit, satisfied at the clatter that caused the huge plastic bin to shake as it landed at the bottom. I dropped the lid carelessly and turned back, making my way back into the room. I figured Kougu wouldn't be happy with my actions, but I really didn't care. All I wanted was for there to be one day... Just one day without bloodshed, one day which I didn't have to fear for anyone's life or watch anyone suffer pain. Was that too much to ask? (Sorry Charlie, but yes it is >xD) I turned to Kougu, my face stern and still rather annoyed at the gun I had held in my hand earlier. “We won't need it.” I said simply, looking him in the eye. If he didn't feel comfortable, if he didn't trust himself, then he would just have to trust me. He was ill, and he needed to let himself heal.
I wandered back over and knelt beside him, not really in the mood to argue.
Tom rubbed his hands together, causing small, dusty clumps of dry blood to waft from his hands and arose to his feet. “Right then,” he said brightly, looking slightly awkward. “Come on, big guy. Let's get you sorted out.”
I raised an eyebrow in surprise. I looked at him. “Don't you have anywhere you need to be?”
Tom shrugged. “Well, I've got a Rottweiler at home that'll need walking soon, but I'm sure he can wait half an hour or so.” He turned back to Kougu as I pulled myself to my feet. “Will you need a hand to get up?” He asked casually, shifting his weight slightly.
“Thank you.” I said to him, my lips pulling into a tiny, yet completely sincere smile. “Honestly, I don't know where we'd be without you.”
“well,” Tom cocked his head in regards to my comment, gesturing to Kougu. “Kougu would be more likely than not, dead. And you would b-”
“Alright, alright. You made your point.” I said with an amused smirk, offering Kougu a hand. “Let's just get on with, shall we?” I looked Kougu right in the eye, letting out a sigh. “And you and I are going to have a chat later, Mister.” I looked at him for a minute longer, although my expression began to relax much more. I didn't really care what had happened there whilst I was on my way up. The important thing was that Kougu was alive, and I was determined to keep it that way.

((Okay, since I have so little time now, you’ll just have to excuse my short, rushed posts. XD ))

“Oh, I'm Tom. Tom Lacey.” The man introduced himself, still sounding a little too friendly for Kougu’s liking. Eyeing him suspiciously, Kougu slowly bowed his head in a respectful nod – though his hawk-like gaze never left the man’s face. “Thanks, Tom.” He murmured, his voice so quiet that it was lost in the silence like a butterfly in a hurricane.
“Listen, Kougu. I'm a doctor.” There it was again… That kindness! In fact this time, Tom sounded kind to the point of patronising. How dare this stranger take such a ‘fatherly’ tone with him?! It was really starting to agitate him…
Kougu felt his veins rising slightly with frustration – his facial muscles twitching, though not quite enough to be visible.
Why am I so angry?! He wondered irritably – his lack of knowledge only making him all the more incensed.
“You're seriously wounded, you know that. You've been shot near some vital organs, and I'm not sure what internal damage there is in there.
But what I do know - well, I'm certain of -is that you're very unlikely to survive if I just leave you, now. I have a first aid kit in the back of the car. Just let me bandage you up and give the two of you a lift home, then I'll leave you be.”
Tom was still talking, but Kougu was not listening. White hot fury roared like a flame in his ears, deafening him completely. He felt an animalistic urge to launch himself at Tom – claw at the man’s smiling mouth, and bit down on his blood-smeared hands.
You shouldn’t be wearing my blood when you could wear your own… Kougu thought viciously, his eyes narrowing slightly, and his muscles tensing in preparation to strike.
He was about to leap forward, when suddenly, sanity struck.
What the Hell am I doing?! Kougu thought in a panic, slumping hurriedly back against the wall, and slowly calming himself.
“You’re not a doctor.” Kougu informed Tom mildly, gazing glass-eyed up at the man. “I can tell.”
He didn’t bother telling the man how he knew this, but instead took to staring vaguely into the distance. He felt strange… As though he was apart from his body. Once again, the phrase ‘Out of Body Experience’ leaped to mind, and Kougu accepted it with the same dull detachment that seemed to be dictating all his thoughts and actions.
He glanced toward Tom again, and this time he saw the man staring at the gun – his gun – lying on the floor, and glinting so innocently. Tom’s kind eyes were slowly widening in dawning comprehension, and Kougu’s own narrowed defensively as the man turned back to him.
“You shot... Yourself?”
There was only shock in Tom’s tone, but to Kougu, it sounded mocking and accusatory. “Yes.” He replied defiantly, “But it’s far more complicated than that…”
The defiance leaked from his tone, and Kougu sighed dejectedly, sliding a little further down the wall as his shoulders slumped in defeat.
He heard Charlie saying something in the background, and turned his head slowly to see her shaking the gun – looking somewhat annoyed.
Everything is moving in slow motion. He realised, nodding to himself in dim acceptance. And sounds are losing their clarity again. I’ll pass out if I don’t get out of here soon, and then – Tom’s right. I would surely die… I can’t accept that.
This time, his head shook vaguely as he agreed with himself.
Letting his eyes dart across to Charlie, Kougu saw her throw the gun away. He felt a flash or irritation, but since it was Charlie, he disregarded it – remaining gentle as a lamb as she approached him.
When she spoke, the clarity of her voice dragged him back to the present, and Kougu hurriedly blinked away his stupour.
“And you and I are going to have a chat later, Mister.”
Kougu cringed at these words, then managed a weakly amused smile, and gently grasped Charlie’s proffered hand.
“I didn’t mean to do it…” He whispered suddenly, gripping Charlie’s hand tighter and meeting her gaze directly – his deep blue eyes practically begging her to believe him. As always, Charlie made him regress… Had it been anybody else, he would have demanded they believe him. But Charlie was different… Charlie was special. That was why it was so important that she understood… He had never meant to hurt her. Never meant to make her worry…
“I just wasn’t ready… I let him get inside my head again…” His voice shook slightly with fury and bitterness, but Kougu managed to mostly contain it – outwardly not showing even a sliver of the spine-hackled beast that clawed savagely away inside him, longing to be unleased, and rip to shreds every worthless peon who stood between him and that despicable man he was forced to call ‘father’.
I’ll kill you. Kougu promised silently as the man’s face flashed through his mind. One day, I really will kill you.
“But it’s fine.” Kougu went on, casting his thoughts aside as calmness befell him once more.
“I’ll have another chance.” He concluded, smiling peacefully as he slowly hauled himself to his feet – using Charlie’s hand for support.

He fell back against the wall, gritting his teeth against the pain that lashed through him like an electric shock. He soon realised that, in the state he was in, trying to maintain any sort of independence or dignity was practically impossible.
Trying to ignore the nervous leaping and fluttering of his heart, Kougu slipped his arm over Charlie’s shoulders, and leaned against her for support.
He felt terrible for dragging her into all this, and even worse for having to rely on her so, but what else could he do…
“Sorry.” He murmured softly, as his knees bucked and he fell against her. She was warm… So warm, it was as though her skin was burning him. “S-sorry…” Apologising again, Kougu dropped his gaze to the ground in shame.
“You shouldn’t have to deal with this. I never meant to be a burden to you.”
His tone held a hint of bitterness, but Kougu soon pushed it to the back of his mind, deciding that the time for apologies could come later – when he was not collapsed against Charlie and bleeding his life’s blood onto the floor.
Using Charlie for support – and absolutely hating having to do so – Kougu stumbled forward toward the exit. He dragged his feet determinedly over the floor, forcing his weak body to move, even when his chin was pulled to his chest through the simple fact that his neck could no longer bear the weight of his head.
It was a long and painful journey to Tom’s car – and most frustrating of all was how easily he could have made that exact same journey just an hour or less earlier…
But at least he was alive, and for that: Kougu was grateful.
He was still conscious when he flopped into the back seat of Tom’s car, but barely. He was aware of sounds and movements around him, but he couldn’t make anything out. It was as though he was living in a dream.
When the car started moving, the hum of its engine lulled him, and Kougu felt himself drifting off. But each time, just as he was about to sleep, the car would hit a tiny bump, which would jounce him slightly – and send pain rocketing through him.
At some of these instances, Kougu could not help but moan softly. Sweat beaded on his upper lip with the effort of defying the pain, and his deathly-pale face was constantly contorted in a grimace.
Usually, he was good at hiding the pain, but now that he didn’t want to die, the pain had suddenly become an enemy. It dragged him from life, therefore he feared it – yet it assured him that he was not dead, therefor he relished it.

((Polo thinks we need some time skipping. But if Dreameh has other ideas, please just let me know. I ran out of muse ages ago, so I’m quite content to edit this rubbish out. XD ))

When they reached his house, Kougu was hovering somewhere on the brink of unconsciousness. Occasionally he mumbled something incoherent, but for the most part he was limp and useless. Even so, some degree of awareness remained – and it occurred to him as he was lugged inside, that this was his house. He was ‘home’, in a manner of speaking…
The familiar sights and smells swam around him , and a vague sense of comfort stole over him. Soon enough, his senses faded completely, and Kougu slipped into unconsciousness.
He lost all sense of time and reality in the darkness into which he passed, yet still the ‘light’ did not appear. This time, however, Kougu was not afraid. He knew that he was alive, and he believed that he would not die. Seconds might have been years – centuries might have been minutes… He hadn’t a clue.
Thoughts drifted through his mind, but they never stayed long, and he forgot them as soon as they left. It was a peaceful and restful place for his mind, and Kougu soon found himself wondering if he ought to stay. What incentive had he to wake, after all…? Things were so perfect here. So empty. So peaceful… Would it be so bad to stay forever…?
The thought drifted from him, and Kougu lost his grasp on it – resuming his aimless acceptance of the nothingness.
This went on quite some time, until finally, he remembered his incentive: Charlie!
The moment he remembered her, Kougu’s eyes darted open.
The light blinded him, and he closed them again instantly, then opened just one eye a tiny crack.
Slowly, carefully, he eased his way back into consciousness – allowing his eyes to gradually adjust to the world around him.

((Wow, epic suckness. XD But I totally finished it tonight! Haha! WOOOP! ))

((Okay, don't get your hopes up. It's rubbish. And I apologize for not getting it done when I said I would. Things keep popping up and people keep stealing the computer...
Should have a calmer weekend, though ))

The sheet-white hand wrapped itself around mine, the algid skin causing me to shudder involuntarily as Kougu's deep blue eyes met mine with a slight flicker of apology. “I didn't mean to do it...” he whispered softly, his hand grasping mine even tighter, so much so, in fact, that I was having to hold back a wince. Wow, for a man who'd just been shot – or shot himself, I should say – he didn't seem to lose much of his strength, did he?
His gaze gripped mine for a moment longer, as he seemed to desperately seek my forgiveness, to make me understand what had happened.
But no matter how hard I tried, because I hadn't been there to witness what mind games Kougu's father had been playing, I couldn't bring myself to understand why this had to have happened. What sort of man persuaded his son to kill himself?
Then again, what sort of man named his son a 'tool' to begin with?
It was official: There was no end to the strange, twisted ways of Kougu's father's mind. Obviously, unless I spent an entire lifetime with the man – a fate I would be doomed to if I was so unfortunate as to have to go through such a living Hell – I would never understand. That man was wrong in the head. There was no two ways about it.
“I just wasn’t ready… I let him get inside my head again…”
That didn't surprise me. Getting inside people's heads seemed to be the only thing that man could do properly. Being a father, on the other hand...
“But it's fine. I’ll have another chance.” The peace and composure in his promise made my heart sink. Did he really think I'd let him go through all this again? I couldn't risk losing him to hatred for the second time, no matter how desperately he wanted it. His father was the only thing keeping him alive, yes, but after seeing what he was capable of achieving, he was also insanely dangerous to Kougu's well-being. If that man got anywhere within speaking distance with Kougu again... Well, goodness knows what he could make him do. Not only could he persuade him to turn on himself, but he could make him do Hellish things, to me, to mother...
No. Kougu wasn't that sort of person. He had self control. He just needed to know how and when to use it...

With a bit of help from me – and a few wabbly starts – Kougu was on his feet. He wrapped an arm around me shoulder, whispering a quiet apology in the process, before leaning against me for support. I wasn't surprised, nor was I bothered by the fact of having him so close. I was just happy that he was ready to rely on me to keep him standing without bothering so much about what he was actually doing. I raised a hand and took his in mine, hauling him up to a firm stance so he wouldn't end up falling and dragging me down with him. However, my efforts were delayed as the weight of his head caused his body to droop forward, and it wasn't until I heard the self-contempt in his voice that I realised why his head was drooped. He was ashamed.
“You shouldn’t have to deal with this. I never meant to be a burden to you.”
“You're not a burden.” I muttered quietly, trying to concentrate on keeping him upright. “If you're a burden to anyone, it's yourself.”
With that, and after following Tom to the car, Kougu and I shuffled clumsily to the back seat. I had to bend his legs to make him fit - since it wasn't much of a big car - despite the fact that this was going against Tom's 'don't move his legs' rule. Besides, I'd have to bend them wherever we put him due to his tall figure, anyway. With a gentle repositioning of his feet, I managed to close the door without fear of breaking something and made my way back to the front seat. Tom closed the door of the office carefully before sitting himself down in the driver's seat, putting on his seat belt.
I did the same.
Without another word, we pulled away from the office, leaving the mysterious office and gun in the dustbin and set off down the road.

Tom glanced anxiously at Kougu through the mirror. His hazel eyes bored into Kougu's weak slits unblinkingly; I was surprised he'd managed to keep the car on the narrow street roads. With a light sigh, Tom looked back at the road and turned a corner.
“I tell you what,” he muttered, “it's a good job I had the dog mat on.”
I frowned at him. Dog mat?
“That plastic sheet,” he added, as if reading my mind. “It's to stop the dog hairs from getting on the seats.
I twisted round on my seat to see a thin, clear plastic covering over the seats, dotted with small, rubber balls, probably to catch the dog hairs. I raised an eyebrow. I didn't even know why I was so interested. Nodding, I turned back to face the road, then a thought popped into my head. “Wait, rottweilers molt?”
“You'd be surprised.” He replied. “Especially when the hairs are black, and I have a cream carpet at home.”
I chuckled quietly, just in time for us to go over a small bump in the road. Kougu moaned.
“Sorry.” Tom mumbled.
My smile vanished.
Why was I laughing? Kougu still wasn't free from this, yet. He could still die between the time it took to get back from where we were. Tom's attempts to lighten the mood had worked for a bit, but not long enough to get my mind of Kougu completely.
I had to keep him awake.
But how?

“Kougu?” I asked clearly. “Are you alright?”
Another bump. Another moan.
Tom winced.
“Kougu?”
Nothing.

Silence consumed us all for the rest of the journey, and after a few directions from me we appeared outside Kougu's house. Tom and I got out and helped carry Kougu into his room, laying him gently on his bed.
“I'll go get the first aid kit.” Tom said softly, rushing out to the car.
I knelt beside the bed, my eyes studying the beads of sweat forming on Kougu's upper lip and temple with a deep, concerned frown. The amount of pain he must have gone through in those short ten or fifteen minutes...
It was all my fault.
Why hadn't I got there sooner? Why hadn't I realised a bit earlier? If I'd used my head before he'd left the house, if I'd picked up the signs, I would have been able to stop this from happening. Kougu shouldn't have had to go through what he did. If he'd just talked to me...
Regrets flooded through my mind and before I knew it, tears began to prick at my eyes once again.
And what had I said about regrets and how they don't work?
“Right. Since he's not properly conscious, and because I have no anaesthetic, I'll just quickly sew him up whilst he's awake.”
I winced, not taking my eyes off Kougu. I gently took his hand and pressed it against my face. Tom snapped open his small green box and pulled out a few wipes, a needle and thread.
“He's got blood on his back, so I think the bullet by his stomach exited as soon as it entered. In a way, that's better than having to remove anything.” Tom babbled on as he threaded the needle. “All I need to do is stitch up this affected tissue and check to see if any organs have been hit. His other wounds can just be bandaged.” He handed me a couple of white rolls, and it took me a couple of moments to realise he meant for me to bandage Kougu's other wounds myself. My eyes widened.
I didn't know how to do that!
“It's just his arm and foot.” Tom added. “Leave the torso to me.”
“Erm... O-okay...” I said uncertainly and slowly, awkwardly began to bandage up his upper arm. It looked better than my improvisation with my jumper the other day, but it wasn't too much better. I could see a small red stain begin to grow where his wound was, so I kept wrapping and wrapping until the red could not be seen. I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to do this, but I couldn't bare to see any more blood after all that had happened.
Tom busied himself stitching up the wounds on Kougu's front, then turned him over to his side quickly to stitch up his back. He told me he wasn't sure how it would heal, but that if we needed help to either ring him or call 999. Once he had finished bandaging up Kougu's torso he helped me finish up with Kougu's ankle and heel – which was a little harder than his arm – and finished with a brief instruction on how he was to eat for the next week. I almost laughed at the thought. This was just another excuse for Kougu not to eat. But I remained silent and listened intently to what he had to say.
“Give him water, to start off with. His system may be a little - 'put back' shall we say – with the wounds. After a couple of days try giving him liquid foods, like soup and such. Feed him those for a good week or two, then see how he is with normal food. In another two weeks his digestive system should be pretty much healed.”
Tom handed me his number for emergencies and stood up to leave.
“Tom?”
He looked at me questioningly.
“Stay for a bit. Please? I'll make you a hot drink, if you want one.”
“No need.” Tom shook his head, smiling gratefully. He gestured behind him to nothing in particular. “The dog needs me.”
The dog. Right. “Fair enough.” I smiled in amusement, still knelt down beside the bed. “Well, thanks anyway.”
“Welcome.” He pointed to Kougu casually as he backed away towards the door. “Don't get excited, but I think he's waking up.”

My head snapped towards Kougu as his eyes fluttered open.
“Kougu? Kougu, hey.”
My fingers gripped his hand perhaps a little too tightly. The sight brought back the memories of our first day, when I grabbed his hand, back when I didn't know any better, and he freaked out and nearly killed that policeman. It seemed like years ago, now.
“Hey, sleepy head. It's me.” I was so tempted to dab away the sweat form his temple, and maybe even dare myself to wipe away the beads from his lip. But of course, that would be taking it a bit too far, for him. Too much, too soon.
“I'll see you later, Charlie.” Tom raised a hand in a still wave. As he backed into the corridor.
“See you, Tom.” I smiled. “And thanks again.”
He nodded, turned on his heel, and disappeared out the front door.

I turned back to Kougu. Was he okay? Could he feel anything? Anything at all? Was he bothered that Tom had helped bandage him up?
Look at me, Kougu. Look at me... Please...

“Kougu? Kougu, hey.”
Charlie’s voice entered his thoughts, fluttering fleetingly past his ears in such a way that he was not entirely sure if he had heard it, or just imagined it. But all the same, it motivated him even further to overthrow the crushing darkness, so he blinked a couple of times, slowly starting to look around the room.
Presently, he heard voices again – and although distant and blurry – he could tell that they were definitely real, this time.
“Hey, sleepy head. It's me.” That was Charlie… She had been speaking to him after all. He managed to turn his head slightly, and squinted in the direction her voice had come from, but everything appeared overly bright and blurry. He could make out vague shapes, but not yet any detail.

“I'll see you later, Charlie.”
That was a man’s voice! Struck by panic, Kougu felt a rush of adrenaline quicken his recovering process. He blinked his eyes hurriedly into focus, then raised his head weakly, glancing toward the door – just in time to see a man turn to step outside. ” “See you, Tom.” Charlie said with a smile, “And thanks again.”
Ah, yes – Tom. Kougu had almost forgotten… No, that was not entirely true – he had forgotten completely until that very moment. He had forgotten everything from meeting Tom to being helped by Tom…
Tom. He thought presently, Strange name. I suppose it’s short for Thomas. Kougu considered this for a good few minutes, before finally realising its complete and utter irrelevance to anything and everything. Well, he supposed he was improving somewhat, since at least now he recognised when his thoughts were irrelevant. Not that it stopped him from thinking them, of course.
Still – Tom was about to leave – best focus now, and think about all the unimportant things in life later.
Priorities, He reminded himself wisely, Are very important. Very important indeed.

“Thank you… Tom Lacey.” Kougu murmured – his voice soft, but clear as a bell – and ringing with sincerity. He was most displeased that Tom had had to help him, but he was also incredibly grateful for it. He doubted he’d have managed to survive, if left to his own devices. But as it were, he was relatively confident that he was going to make it… And it was all thanks to Tom and Charlie.
“Thank you…” He repeated quietly – mostly to himself – as he heard the door shut behind Tom with a soft ‘click’.
He stared blankly at it a while, wondering if he would ever see Tom again. He hoped he would… He had been most impolite to the man who had saved his life, after all. He supposed that he should like to have an opportunity to apologise some day – and thank Tom properly, as well. Though he didn’t think he could ever express quite how grateful he was… That feeling when he had thought he was going to die, after deciding he wanted to live…? Well, he didn’t he ever had – or ever would – feel anything quite so frightening in his entire life.
To think the he, Kougu, would be afraid of death. This was a twist in the story of his life that he had not once expected. To think that Charlie had changed him to this extent was inconceivable. Yet, clearly, it was true.
“Charlie.” Kougu breathed with a sigh, turning his head to face her. His face seemed gaunt and exhausted – his cheeks sunken in more than ever, and his complexion almost grey, yet there was a peaceful sort of relaxation about his expression. Just being in Charlie’s presence, after being so certain he was never going to see her again, was enough to soothe his every worry.
“Hi.” He said simply, one corner of his mouth lifting in a crooked smile.
He watched her a moment longer – but having to look up at her so bothered him greatly. He felt terribly weak and inferior, staring up at her face like this.
So, motivated by this discomfort, Kougu braced his arms against the wall behind him, and slowly lifted himself into a sitting position – wincing and hissing through his teeth in pain as the newly-stitched wound in his torso ached and throbbed. “Ow, ow, ow, ow.” He complained irritably – finally managing to get himself into a sitting position, then slumping back against the headrest, and trying hard to ignore the sensation of a thousand white-hot needles being stabbed into his flesh with every painful throb from his wounds. “I tell you, this whole ‘getting shot’ thing is starting to get really old…” He complained with a weak chuckle, brushing his hand briefly over his forehead to unstick his hair from his sweaty brow. It obeyed his hand’s urging, but remained standing upright – damp strands sticking out in every direction and leaving him looking as helplessly messy as ever. He shook his head, then pressed his palms to his face – rubbing his eyes in an attempt to properly wake himself. He was finding it difficult to focus, since all he really wanted to do was sleep – yet at the same time, he longed to talk to Charlie.
This was strange in a way, since he rather dreaded it, too. Now that she wasn’t afraid that he was going to die, she would probably be terribly angry about him leaving without telling her – let alone shooting himself. He wondered vaguely if she had believed him when he had told her that he hadn’t meant to do it. He had given her reason enough before to believe that he was capable of suicide, after all…
Hell, he had tried to kill himself right in front of her. Stupid choice, that… He still couldn’t believe he had tried it – nor could he comprehend why… Why did his actions always end up hurting Charlie…

As this thought struck him, Kougu glanced away – any happiness fading from his face as a frown replaced his style. He bowed his head in shame – disappointed with himself – and took a moment to consider what he had done. He claimed to love Charlie – and love her he did – but didn’t that mean that he was supposed to make her happy, rather than make her worry all the more – endlessly increasing her worry?
Gosh, he was useless. She had to have bugs for a brain to love him… Unless she had just been saying that…
”I love you.” The simple, whispered words echoed through his mind – and some part of him was completely confident that they would true… Another wished them to be. But as usual, his cynical side insisted that she had most likely just said such a thing to convince him not to give up and die. She was a good person, so naturally she would want to save him – but that did not necessarily mean she loved him. He wouldn’t put it past Charlie to lie to save his life.
What about that feeling when you heard her words? Kougu asked himself – challenging the voice in his head, as always. What about that perfect acceptance in the realisation that you had known you had her love all along. A figment of your imagination? I think not. That was real.
Content with his argument, Kougu found his opinion slowly shifting. Perhaps Charlie had meant those words after all… In which case, he ought to be overjoyed. Yet instead, he was nervous. First and foremost, what if he had it wrong? And, assuming he had it right, what would happen from them? If it was decided that he and Charlie were, in fact, in love – where did they go from there? He did not understand… He had never witnessed ‘love’ before… It was a miracle he had even recognised the emotion when he had finally felt it. But all the same, how was he supposed to solve something that had no formula? It struck him briefly that perhaps he ought to draw up an algorithm for himself, but he feared his knowledge on the topic was not quite vast enough. If Charlie would help him, perhaps that plan would work, but he doubted she would want to be involved in such a seemingly ridiculous plan…

Suddenly, it occurred to Kougu that he had been staring at the floor and chewing thoughtfully on his thumb nail for quite some time – most likely looking like a vegetable circling the plug. He flicked out his fingers in disgust, then slowly raised his head to look at Charlie.
When his eyes met hers, he could have sworn he felt his heart skip a beat – And though he knew that this was impossible, that didn’t stop it from happening again, and again, and again…
His stomach churned in what he vaguely recognised as fear… Yet somehow, it was a good feeling.
Kougu cast about for courage, and as he began to relax ever so slightly, he was lucky enough to find some.
“We’re alone, now.” He pointed out mildly, a slight smile lifting his bloodless lips. He paused a moment, slightly hesitant, and swallowed against the sickly feeling rising in his throat – most likely from a combination of nerves and pain. He really wasn’t great with this ‘expressing one’s feelings’ stuff… It simply made no sense to him. Nothing ever did, when it had no concrete answer. Still, he knew that if he just managed to relax, he would be okay…
He gnawed uncertainly on his lip for a while, then managed to calm himself, and glanced slightly shyly at Charlie. This was something of a new expression for him. He had been nervous before plenty of times, but shy somehow seemed another thing entirely. He wasn’t sure what to make of it.
“Now that I actually can speak to you, I think…” He trailed off, unsure of the best way to word what he intended to say. He considered this for a brief moment – grateful for his quick-thinking mind – then began again. “There are a few things I should have said to you before, except that I couldn’t at the time…” He took a deep breath, then launched into his list – blocking out the pain that was raging through his body with increasing severity.
“Firstly, I’m sorry. Really, really sorry. I mean, I’ve said that a few times already – but frankly I don’t think I’ve said it enough… I doubt I ever can, but since it hurts to talk, that’ll have to be enough for now…”
He paused, just for the briefest of moments, and caught his breath. When the pain had subsided slightly, he continued.
“Next – goodbye. I know you wouldn’t have liked to hear it any more than I’d have liked to say it, but it was still wrong of me to sneak off like that, and leave you without even an explanation… I managed to convince myself that I only did it to protect you, but that isn’t true. It was selfish, and cowardly – not to mention downright stupid. So, although it’s long overdue, Goodbye, Charlie, until we meet again.” He managed a weak, timid smile – then took a few moments to prepare for what he planned to say next.
Finally he was ready.
“And lastly-“
False alarm… His words caught in his throat, and Kougu had to take a little more time to properly relax before trying again. Gradually, as he drew in a deep breath, the tension left him.
“I love you, too.” He managed, a smile stemming from his eyes, and slowly starting to pull at his lips.
“I don’t have a fancy speech to go with that one, but if mere actions would suffice…”
As he realised what he was about to do, Kougu heard a thousand voices in his head erupting into screams – listing every logical reason why this was a bad, bad idea – but all he found himself capable of listening to was the pull in his heart… A feeling that he knew was only a figment of his imagination to begin with, yet which felt more real than anything to him.
He grabbed Charlie’s hand, and his pale lips split into a slightly impish grin as he pulled her toward him – managing to lean forward despite the pain to meet her half way.
This is what you want, right, Charlie? The voice in his head asked hesitantly – its silence loud as drums. Because it’s sure as hell going to crush what little confidence I have if you reject me now.
He released her hand – letting his fingers reach for her shoulder, then creep around behind her head – threading through her soft hair.
He leaned a little closer, but just was his lips were about to meet hers – Kougu froze, his doubts and fears striking him with the force of a sledgehammer.
I can’t make that last inch. He realised with a jolt – his heart hammering against his ribcage.
I can’t bail now… He scolded himself – but still, he couldn’t quite bring himself to kiss Charlie like this. Completely of his own accord, and in complete sanity. He wanted to, he desperately wanted to, and he had thought that he could – but now he had failed, and he could feel his confidence draining rapidly because of it.
I just wasn’t ready… He thought to himself bitterly, Damn.
But still, he didn’t pull back just yet. Just in case… By some miracle… He could find the will to kiss Charlie like he wanted to.


((Poor Kougu. His evil creator tried to make him kiss her, but he just wouldn't. XD
Still, I figured these two were due for another little soppy session, so I had to try to convince him... :3 ))

((I'm sorry, Polo. It's not very good and short. Turns out my plans for Charlie weren't as plentyful as I'd hoped -_- Make of it what you like ))

“Charlie.” Kougu whispered weakly with a sigh. I could have cried at that moment, mostly because I had seen him look so calm in a long while. I was grateful that he had finally seen sense and thanked Tom as he left, seen as he had saved Kougu's life. I would have been lying if I'd said it was all me, after all. If I'd been left to my own defenses, Kougu would probably have been dead due to my lack of knowledge, along with a bad mix if panic and desperation. If it had just been me and him, if Tom hadn't asked me if I needed his help, Kougu would have lost blood a long time ago. Of course, the least Tom deserved was thanks.
“Hi.”
I began to giggle quietly at his weak attempt at speaking, his choice of words. Out of all the things he could have said, 'hi' was probably the best. I rested my head on the edge of the bed where I was knelt, shaking my head slowly in amusement. “Hi.” I said, looking back up at him with a smile. God... I was glad to have him back again. The past half hour or so just seemed a blur now. Kougu was back, and everything was going to be okay. My heart lurched , sanctity from finally having Kougu with me, fully, once more, felt like bliss. I hadn't been this happy since he'd put his hand on my shoulder that time at the corner shop. I giggled again.
“You survived, then.” I teased, resting my elbows up on the side of the bed.
Kougu slowly propped himself onto his elbows, shuffled around on the bed until he was in a sitting position, and with a few pained 'ow's managed to slump back on the rest behind him. I had no idea what he was going to achieve from this, but I let him anyway. As long as he didn't try and stand - in which I would have to try and stop him – then he was fine. But I had to remind him to take it easy. He needed sleep, and lots of it.
“I tell you, this whole ‘getting shot’ thing is starting to get really old…” He complained with a quiet chuckle, running a hand through his sweaty hair. It peeled easily from his brow, but ended up sticking up wildly in places, almost making him look alike some mad professor in a lab who had just blown something up accidentally. All that was missing was a few black smudges...
“You know, it will keep happening. Until we stop getting involved with guns, there will always be someone to get shot, or get in the way.” I said quietly, pushing myself into a stand. “That's why I threw your gun away. Because I can't do with having to cope with us both going through this all the time. I'm just... Sick of it.”
Kougu said nothing.

For a few moments, we were both silent. Kougu sat, chewing at his thumbnail, seemingly deep in thought. It had occurred to me that this might be because of how nervous he was to talk to me, but soon let it pass. Neither of us talked, mostly because neither of us wanted to. It seemed lik there was nothing to say, yet so much at the same time.
Eventually, Kougu spoke up.
“We're alone now.” Okay, so it wasn't quite what I was expecting, especially when I saw the slightly mischievous sparkle in his eyes. But I listened, because I was so glad to have him back again, it didn't really matter what he said. I was still getting over what had happened earlier, I wasn't in the mood for scoldings and apologies. Still, I let him talk. “Now that I actually can speak to you, I think…” He paused for a moment, seemingly thinking through what he was about to say, then resumed. “There are a few things I should have said to you before, except that I couldn’t at the time…
“Firstly, I’m sorry. Really, really sorry. I mean, I’ve said that a few times already – but frankly I don’t think I’ve said it enough… I doubt I ever can, but since it hurts to talk, that’ll have to be enough for now…”
“Yes, so shut up.” I said with a soft, forgiving smile. “Honestly. You're back now and I'm not going to let you out of my sight until your wounds heal. There's nothing to apologize for. Just...” I sighed, closed my eyes, them continued speaking. “Tell me before you go running off again, would you? Seriously, it seems every time you run out without telling me, you come back bleeding.”
I rolled my eyes at the memory, letting my weight relax to one side. Before I could complain any more, Kougu started speaking again.
“Next – goodbye. I know you wouldn’t have liked to hear it any more than I’d have liked to say it, but it was still wrong of me to sneak off like that, and leave you without even an explanation… I managed to convince myself that I only did it to protect you, but that isn’t true. It was selfish, and cowardly – not to mention downright stupid. So, although it’s long overdue, Goodbye, Charlie, until we meet again.” He ended this with a small, timid smile and this made me uncomfortable. I didn't like talking about 'goodbye'. It reminded me that I wouldn't be able to prevent Kougu from harm forever, and that he would either die or kill himself, eventually. My face fell.
“You're right. You were stupid.” I said simply, letting out a sigh. I shrugged helplessly. “But how do we learn from mistakes if we don't make them in the first place?”
Change the subject, Please...
“I love you, too.”
I stared at him, eyes wide. Okay, perhaps I hadn't seen that one coming... Raising my eyebrows, I slowly let the words digest and before I knew it, I was mirroring his expression. The smile at my lips grew into a playful grin, and I watched the smile from his eyes grow, like a pool of water on a flat surface, to the rest of his face. “I don’t have a fancy speech to go with that one, but if mere actions would suffice…”
Before I could comprehend what was going on, he grabbed my hand and pulled me forward, and I ended up sinking to a sitting position on the bed beside him. The strings bounced, causing us both to rock like a boat on the ocean, until it calmed and we were left staring at each other, getting closer, closer...

Our faces were drawing nearer towards each other, and it wasn't long before I could feel Kougu's hot breath on my lips. Our fingers knotted together, and I shifted myself gingerly towards him, slowly so that I wouldn't make him panic too much. But just as I was getting ready to kiss him, he stopped leaning forward. Our faces hovered off one another, our eyes wide open. We were so close that trying to see his pupils made me feel dizzy. Yet neither one of us dared to let our lips meet.
My breathing was heavy due to the lack of oxygen, and I could feel myself getting hotter the longer I stayed there.
I let out a sigh and brought his hand gently to rest on my knee. With a slightly nervous giggle, I whispered. “Can I have my heart back, please?”
I decided he wasn't going to get any closer, unless I made a move myself. So steadily, I leaned forward, letting my lips brush against his nose and kissed his cheek. I waited a few seconds, relishing the feeling of his pale skin over my lips whilst I still could. I then twisted my head and dug my face lightly in his hollow jawline and kissed there once or twice for good measures.
“There,” I whispered, forcing myself to pull back slightly, and rested my forehead against his. “That's all you're getting until I've seen you sleep.” My eyes met his for a few seconds – which felt like hours, to me – and I let out a soft breath over his bloodless skin. Those eyes... Both old and new, fresh and pure; all those things I'd described him as when he'd been unconscious, I could see them all in his eyes. Those hidden secrets no one could see. All those memories he didn't wish to remember. Those eyes I knew he wouldn't be the same without, and that I'd learned to love throughout my time with him. I watched the love in them grow as they looked at me, right at me, and felt almost as if they were boring right into my soul.
My heart lurched once more at the familiar feeling of being so close to him, thankful for being given this opportunity again. I released my weight from his forehead and kissed it instead.
“You need rest.” I said simply. Maybe, just maybe I could use that as an excuse not to kiss him when and where he wanted. Maybe I could bribe him to sleep. But would it be enough? Hand still on his, I gently rubbed his cold fingers in attempt to warm them. “Just an hour or so, and I'll be happy. I promise you, this can continue once I've seen you sleep. I'll be right beside you.” I kissed his forehead one more time, then sat back, still having a hold of his hand. “I promise.”

((Haha! Noooo, silly Dreameh! I loved it! I'm like... Reading it over and over. O.o Can't quite decide what to make of it. Or rather, what Kougu's going to make of it. XD Haha! Tis very strange and tricky, since he's really not the sort of character I expected to get into any sort of romantic situation. Like... Ever. XD
I'm actually going to start my reply right now... If I can ever stop reading it... :3 And mine will be short, too, since I'm lacking time - so no worries. *Huggles*

Thank you for the super post. *Nods* ))