Two Batty Kids :: Me and Polo

If he could have, the compliment would have made him blush more, but it seemed as if he were already as red as he could get. He fought to keep his sanity, to keep in mind the fact that this was definitely not good for him, and that he should have probably turned away and left the room ages ago. But then who would have taken care of his incapacitated roommate?
The touch on his cheek was what did James in. All thoughts vanished and he leaned in softly to the sensation, letting his eyelids gradually droop.
"What do you want? Honestly."
You. To leave. To kiss you. To run away. To hold you. To ask for a new roommate. To accept myself. To be normal.
James swallowed heavily and let his eyes open again, hoping that Orion could see the turmoil rolling within him, that this was not an easy situation to be in for him. Maybe he would feel guilty about this in the morning - if he wasn't too busy fighting his hangover. A small part of him was sadistically happy about that, but he pushed it away, covered it with more intense feelings.
"What I want is for you to go to bed." He said with exasperation.
Fuck it.
"If I kiss you will you go to bed?" James added, doing his best to sound like an irritated parent, but his voice came out strangled and weak. It even cracked a little bit. He bit his lip and glanced down.

Orion's gaze softened when he saw the conflict in James's face, but despite how it pained him to see his friend in such a state, it only made Orion want to reach out to him all the more. To be there for him, to comfort and console him and ease his troubled mind. 'Just friends' just couldn't cut it any more. He had so much more to give than cheap, superficial friendship. It wasn't enough; it never could be enough. Not for him. Not when it came to James.
Quietly, he spoke his roommate's name, urging for a response; but instead of overcoming the conflict within himself, instead of reaching a decision, James stubbornly avoided it, and answered instead, "What I want is for you to go to bed."
Orion's brows drew together slightly, his face falling in disappointment. Rejection would have stung, but this ambivalent response was the worst of all. It left him hanging in purgatory, and by this point, he was just damn sick of being there. 
Shoulders slumping and a sigh brooding on his lips, Orion was about to back off when suddenly, James spoke up once more. Either he had noticed Orion's disappointment, else he had reached some extent of conclusiveness himself, for what he said next was something that piqued Orion's interest instantly.
"If I kiss you will you go to bed?"
It was not what he'd been going for, but he'd take it. It was a step in one direction, be it big or small, and right or wrong. He barely knew himself... He just knew that anything was better than the life of limbo that James was so obviously living. Slowly, he nodded his head.
"Okay."
No further words were spoken, but the gentle hum of Orion's voice lingered just a moment, warm and comforting. He watched his friend look down nervously, biting his lip, and if it were possible, his gaze softened further still. With a quiet tap of rubber soles on wood, he stepped forward, pausing just a moment to give James time to compose himself, or to step away if he changed his mind.
'He wants this.' He reminded himself firmly, 'He needs it, too. He can't go on living a lie forever.'
Why can't he, if he's content? Why fix what isn't broken?
Too drunk to recognize the distant thought as wisdom, Orion dismissed it easily and reached for James's face, closing large, rough hands around those dainty cheeks. Their eyes met exactly, and Orion wondered absently if James was taller than he was. He had never seemed it, until he'd come this close. 
He licked his lips once - showing just the faintest indication of nerves - then he bowed his head, and with a quick breath, he leaned in and kissed James as though he were the only man on earth.
Their lips touched neatly, with none of the rushed, clumsy jostling from before; and though the feeling it sparked was like magic coursing through his veins, Orion did not leave it to linger. He kissed his friend sweetly, politely, and then pulled back just a little, his head tipping forward to balance against James's brow. Fingers straying slightly from their spot, he stroked his friend's cheek once - as though petting a baby bird just fallen from the nest - then stepped away completely, letting the frigid air expand between them like an iceberg. In his mind he cursed the distance, and yet he made no move to close it. His intention had never been to push James; to frighten or overwhelm him. All he'd ever wanted was to express - in a way that words could not - the unbelievable fondness that this man made him feel.
He had done that now, and with it, James could do what he wished.

Okay.
Who knew that one word could send his heart racing in his chest and cause his breathing to speed up so rapidly? James could feel a trickle of sweat roll down his back slowly, causing him to twitch uncomfortably. The fabric of his shirt scratched at his skin gently. Never had he been so aware of every sensation coursing through his body.
The sound of the floor creaking made him lift his head, just in time to see Orion's hands reaching for him, clasping his cheeks with a gentleness that seemed so strange compared to the rest of him. His eyes flickered up to meet Orion's and he got completely lost in them. Sure, that was a corny saying that James thought that lovesick teenage girls had come up with when writing stories, but now he knew that it was a real, actual feeling. Even the soft lips pressing to his surprised him, so lost in the sea of green he was.
The kiss was nothing like the hurried, fumbling mess from before, when James had practically thrown himself at the other man and attacked him. No, this was different. Softer, more patient, more... touching, almost as if Orion cared about him as more than a plaything for when he was drunk.
And something in James's chest jumped at that thought. It seemed entirely plausible that Orion cared about him right then - but maybe the man was just confusing him for Luke again. That was probably the most likely scenario, as Orion was definitely sloshed enough to think of that sort of delusion. If that was the case, then-
An involuntary groan rose from James's throat when there was an emptiness where Orion's lips had been seconds before. At least the man had the courtesy not to pull away completely; his forehead continued to rest again James's as his hand gently touched his cheek, sliding it down, and finally completely away from his face. Then Orion stepped back, away, breaking off all contact between them.
It might have been the chill of the evening, but suddenly it was all James could do to hold back a shiver. The pair stared at each other for a while, James not exactly sure what exactly he was going to do. He could close the gap between them and kiss Orion again - he really wanted to - but that would completely throw his heterosexuality down the drain. Because he definitely was not gay. He could hug the man - that would be nice - but again, very unmanly. Force his roommate to go to bed? That seemed to be the only option.
James finally dropped his gaze to the ground, and then flicked it up to Orion's bed.
" All right, nighty night."
His stomach roiled at the thought of just leaving what had just happened without resolving anything.
He stood there for a little longer, just staring at Orion. His thoughts warred, and the noise in his head gradually grew to a point that he couldn't hear any reason within him at all.
Fuck it.
James stepped forward, closing that small distance between them and reached a hand to tangle in the back of Orion's mussy black hair, and leaned in, just close enough that their lips were mere millimeters apart. His eyes were half closed, his other hand, set gently on the other man's shoulder. After a moment of hesitation, he let his lips press to Orion's gently, and pulled away after only a few moments like Orion had.
There was a moment of silence, but James didn't step away the way Orion had earlier. He was strangely calm, if slightly giddy. There was no quarreling in his head; it seemed as if he had no thoughts.
"Silly kid," he said quietly, his voice quivering ever so slightly. "I said I was going to kiss you."

Even after he'd stepped back, Orion did not move away. He waited, head pounding with the intensity of his half-formed thoughts, while James stared back at  him, his chest rising and falling a little too quickly for regular breathing. He could almost see the cogs in James's brain turning as he battled with himself, trying to decide what to do. Orion offered him no help. No step away, not a whisper or a wink. He just stood, panting faintly, until at last, James's gaze fell away from his, looking toward his bed. His shoulders slackened.
This was it, then. 
"All right, nighty night."
"Night."
Despite his meek acceptance, he did not move from the spot. James continued to stare, and Orion felt that he could stand there forever if only those eyes would keep looking at him in that way. Although subtle and shaded by confused conflict, the longing was there. It was faint, but it was there, and Orion craved it. At that moment, more than anything, he wanted James to want him. ((Do you need him to need you, too?    )) And judging by the look on his face, he did.
He took a deep breath, then stopped, holding it in without even realizing it. The longer he waited for James to move, the more his heart was racing. His head grew dizzy, and just as he feared his eyes were about to lose focus, James moved toward him.
The pent-up breath fell from his lips, and suddenly his mind became crystal clear as a hand reached for his head. He lowered it obediently, eyes wide with wonder as James inched toward him. He was so close now, Orion could make out every eyelash, even count the little gold flecks in his eyes that he'd never noticed before. His heart skipped a beat, launching a lump into his throat as his eyes studied James's.
They're magnificent...
A dreamlike quality settled over him, and when their lips met and his eyes slid shut, he felt as though he were closing them to an artistic masterpiece as opposed to a living creature. It was only the hot touch of skin and the intoxicating taste of James's lips that convinced him otherwise.
He heard a faint moan issue from his own lips as he slid his hands around James's waist, and some long-slumbering creature within him stirred as he redoubled the passion of the kiss, finding himself caught up and lost in the moment. His one hand began moving up James's back, feeling the man's shirt wrinkle under his touch-
"Hm?" He uttered a soft little sound of confusion when James's lips left his, and slowly, his racing heart was forced to slow. He blushed hotly when he realized the frantic pounding, and willed himself to settle down before he took things too far. 
He expected James to be spooked by the passion, to shove him away, perhaps slap him and bolt; but he did nothing of the sort.
Instead, he stood where he was, wrapped lightly in Orion's embrace and exuding a strange sense of calm that washed over Orion, helping to hush his raging thoughts, all too jumbled to make any sort of sense. He looked into James's eyes - suddenly like two still pools of water - and he felt a soothing sense of warmth extend right to his very soul.
"Silly kid," His friend said quietly, "I said I was going to kiss you."
Slowly, his lips began curving upwards, then split into a crooked grin, almost indecently handsome on his usually sullen face.
"I'm sorry." He purred softly, "My mistake." He raised one hand to pinch James's chin lightly, holding it between thumb and forefinger, then he chuckled to himself and shook his head, folding his arms around his friend's shoulders to draw him into a warm embrace. James fit perfectly in the space between his arms and his chest, as though it were a place made only for him, and as he held the man close to him, his heart fluttered warmly with something somehow different from affection. He felt as though he'd lived this moment before, even felt this feeling, although it seemed to him that something so perfect could not be reproduced twice in one lifetime.
The thought niggled uncomfortable, and suddenly Orion felt a strange sense of mental blindness, as though the clouds in his mind were trying to protect him from something. As gradually as it had come, his smile faded away, replaced for just a moment by a frown.
"Good night, James." He murmured, turning his head to peck the man's temple as he released him. The gesture was too casual, too automatic, and suddenly, Orion felt flustered. Now it was his turn to feel confused.
His head pounded thickly, and he looked to his empty bed with a strange sense of loneliness, reluctant to leave the comfort that he had found in James. The alcohol was steering his emotions in a different direction now, and though he did not understand it, he was not sure that he liked it.
"Will you stay up with me a while?" He requested softly, too drunk to be ashamed of the uncertain look that he cast his roommate, "Just... Just talk a little. Please."
He swallowed thickly, unable to shake the shocking premonition that somehow, come morning, James would be gone from his life. 
This is all just too unreal... Maybe I'm dreaming?

The small, casual smile that twisted Orion's slips upward into a slight grin was breathtaking, even though it really had no right to be. It was nothing, just a small movement of his lips; all the same it made James catch his breath in his throat.
Orion murmured a witty response, and then opened his arms and embraced James. He felt himself beginning to blush at the touch, at the warmth he could feel radiating from the other man's body. He shuddered at the sensation of the contact, but it was more as if he were letting himself - all of his expectations and impossibilities - go, and finally accepting who he was.
Just as he was coming to this realization, Orion stiffened and let go, slowly letting his arms drop to his sides.
"Goodnight, James."
The was a gentle whisper of lips pressing to his head, distant and impersonal, leaving James bewildered and confused. It had almost felt like they were connecting there for a moment, but now Orion was looking at him with turmoil in his expression, as if he were someone else.
Someone else.
Shit, he was thinking about Luke.
That was the only explanation James could think of, as he was not willing to reflect on the possibility that he was just a bad kisser or something - they hadn't made out or anything, so it wasn't like his lack of talent or anything had put this small gap between them.
"Will you stay up with me a while? Just... Just talk a little. Please."
James sighed and stepped a little closer, instinctively reaching and arm up and gently putting it around Orion's shoulder. He looked so much like a kicked puppy at that moment that James wanted to do nothing more than comfort him until all the pain was forgotten.
"Sure, buddy." He whispered, his voice still not completely back to normal. "Sure. Get in bed, though. When you want to fall asleep I don't want you to pass out on the floor." A small smirk twitched the corner of his mouth up because of the thought of the scary looking guy curled up on the floor, sleeping, mouth hanging open and maybe a little snoring here and there.

James neither mocked nor coddled him as Orion had feared he might. Instead, he stepped forward, once more closing the unwelcome gap between them, and extended a comforting arm to wrap around Orion's shoulders. Right away, he felt the tension leave them, and he relaxed under James's touch, not once thinking to fight it. It eased his mind, and as quickly as it had come, the grim feeling began to pass.
"Sure, buddy." His friend answered without a second thought, "Sure. Get in bed, though. When you want to fall asleep I don't want you to pass out on the floor."
He chuckled under his breath - pushing back his fringe so the green stripe split, falling in strands back over face - then nodded obediently.
"Okay, I hear you. Bed it is."
He cleared his throat awkwardly, then removed James's arm delicately from around his shoulders, and took a step toward his bed.
"Whoa!" All at once, the world pitched beneath him as the metaphorical ship struck what felt at first like a tidal wave, then progressed to a cruel, spinning whirlpool. He lost his balance and stumbled sideways, grabbing James's shoulder for support, then snickered feebly at himself.
"Whoopsy, still a bit too drunk for that." He chuckled, staggering forward clumsily, then grabbing hold of the edge of the bed. He stared up at it, swimming and swirling above him, and gulped anxiously. Never in his life had such a short ladder seemed so intimidating.
Certain that he was going to break his neck, he grabbed the top rung - which was just about in line with his shoulders anyway - then stepped on a lower rung. Before he could even try take a step, his foot slipped off and he had to try again. After two more failed attempt, he frowned down at his feet, considering them as he might some complex equation.
"Oh, right!" He slapped a palm to his face, "Shoes!"
Removing these proved every inch as challenging as climbing onto the bed, but he eventually managed it - refusing to accept any help from James - and then finally managed to clamber onto the bed with all the grace of a beached whale, slipping, sweating and cursing all the while. At last, he collapsed on his back on the mattress, panting, and stared tiredly up at the ceiling.
"Never again." He groaned, "I swear they give us these stupid climbing beds on purpose. Like they want to train us to be ninjas or something."
Pulling a face, Orion sat himself up again, and once the resulting wave of dizziness had passed, he patted the bed beside him, gesturing for James to climb up and join him.
"Let's see your ninja skills." He challenged, smirking faintly, "C'mon."

The next five minutes was a mixture of amusement and worry. On one hand, it was hilarious for James to watch Orion stumble around, trying to get up into his bed, but on the other, it would be so easy for him to completely miss a rung, lose his balance, fall backwards, and crack his skull on the floor. James stood behind him, thinking that he would at least try to catch his friend. But he managed to get up the ladder, especially after taking off his shoes. That part had been entertaining to watch, at least.
Finally, after an enormous amount of struggling, the man managed to tumble into bed and settled down, making a comment about how it was as if the university were preparing to make them into ninjas. Then he poked his head over the side of the bed, and with a devilish smirk, said, "Let's see your ninja skills. C'mon."
James sighed and shook his head. "I'm not leaping up there. I'll be lucky if I can manage to climb the ladder, let alone make a show of it." He chuckled and climbed up slowly, and sat down on the opposite edge of the bed.
"Ninja enough for you? I mean, the entire maneuver only took you six and a half minutes, but who's counting?" A wry grin twisted his lips up.
He sat there, waiting for Orion to say something, to talk about whatever he had begged James to stay up with him for.

"I'm not leaping up there." James told him with a firm shake of his head, "I'll be lucky if I can manage to climb the ladder, let alone make a show of it."
Shrugging, Orion watched with a faint smirk as James navigated his way up the ladder, taking it on with remarkable ease in comparison to his attempt. A moment later, his roommate had flopped onto the bed beside him, sitting with his legs hanging off the edge. 
"Ninja enough for you?" James teased, "I mean, the entire maneuver only took you six and a half minutes, but who's counting?"
"Indeed," He replied seriously, "I bow to your superior bed-climbing expertise."
And he did indeed bow, leaning town and twirling his hand, then extending it with a flourish. The gesture made it far easier to believe that he was indeed a gay man.
"So," He straightened up again, holding out his arms to balance against the dizzy swaying, then dropped his hands into his lap and looked at James, smiling mildly. The gesture seemed to come to him without effort now; so remarkably different from when he was sullenly sober.
"How come you hate your sister?" He asked the question as it came to him, randomly and out of the blue, but after a moment, he had something better, so he added that on too, "And what did happen with your parents the other day? You never told me, and you seemed upset." He pointed an accusing finger at James - less accusing, since it wobbled around a ruler's length in the wrong direction - and narrowed his eyes scoldingly. "I wasn't done comforting you, you know. You can't just get your way every time by sucking my face off." He smirked, and tapped his temple, "I remember stuff when I'm drunk."
Apparently, said 'stuff' included neither tact nor dignity.

The two men sat on the bed for a little bit until Orion, in his drunken state, finally spoke up with a seemingly random question. "How come you hate your sister?"
Innocent enough, it seemed, but that was really a tricky thing to answer. He didn't really hate her, per se, but he definitely had a strong dislike towards her, mostly because of the way that she dressed and handled - or rather, let others handle - her private regions.
James was about to say this when Orion tacked on another question to the end of the first.
"And what did happen with your parents the other day? You never told me, and you seemed upset. I wasn't done comforting you, you know. You can't just get your way every time by sucking my face off."
James blushed at the reminder of what had happened, and for a moment wanted nothing more than to say that he was too tired for this late-night discussion shit, and that he had a test in the morning, and that he was going to bed. But he figured that after they had just spent a few moments earlier snogging, then he could probably talk about the first kiss without feeling too self-conscious.
"Yeah, let's not talk about that." He answered the second question first. "It's not really something that I'd like to discuss. Family business, and all... and I am really sorry that I - how did you say it? - sucked your face off. I wasn't really feeling myself." He shrugged, the tips of his ears burning hot with embarrassment as he remembered the other man sprinting off after pulling away in panic. "And I don't hate Tess, honestly. I just really don't like her and would like to pretend that she doesn't exist. She's really dumb, and she's a skank too." He made a face as he remembered all of the pictures he had seen on Facebook of her latest Halloween costume. He had unfriended her, but she complained to his mother, and she'd made him friend her again.
James sighed and looked down at his hands. In the darkness of the room, it was barely possible to make out the outline of them. Absently he wondered what was going to happen after the night had passed and the dawn came.

"You're just saying that because I'm drunk," Orion accused, although he did not really mean it, "If you gave me a chance, I think you'd find I'm a pretty good listener."
James ignored this, continuing as though he had not heard with an apology about the kiss, which Orion shrugged off carelessly. Since they'd had a repeat mere minutes ago, it didn't seem like a big deal any more. In fact, he couldn't for the life of him recall why he had been upset about it in the first place. It was James - in what universe was James kissing him not a good thing? Clearly, his sober self lacked any kind of sense. 
He shook his head at the thought, then looked up quietly as James added, referring back to his first question, "And I don't hate Tess, honestly. I just really don't like her and would like to pretend that she doesn't exist. She's really dumb, and she's a skank too."
He snorted at this, and though he thought it a slightly too harsh and uncalled for classification of the girl that he had met, he did not argue, for risk of upsetting his friend.
"That's the thing about family, I guess." He reflected grimly, "You're stuck with them, whether you get along or not." His hand lifted unconsciously to touch the bruise on his cheek, and he winced, glaring at his own fingers as though it was entirely their fault that he had hurt himself.
"Well," He sighed, "I suppose I can't really relate, but I feel as though I understand. I'm not too fond of my family, either. In fact, I could honestly say that I hate him," His mind showed an image of Mr. Chang's smug face, and he felt his lip curl in disgust, "I suppose that's the bonus of a foster family. It's difficult to hate your own relatives, no matter how abrasive their personalities. So I've heard, anyway." Sighing softly, he let his gaze drop, beginning to pick absently at a thread on the edge of the crumpled duvet beside him.
"I used to think that I should be more grateful. For him taking me in - Mr. Chang, I mean. My foster father." His words became disjointed as he stumbled drunkenly over them, speaking with little regard for his own privacy, which he usually held so dear, "People always told me how lucky I was, adopted by the famous "Han Chang"." His fingers formed sarcastic quotation marks, and he turned his head to spit in disgust, "Sure, at first it was nice to live in a big house, to get three meals a day and a free ride through high school and university. Sure. It sounds like a dream life for some poor orphan kid..." His jaw clenched, and he swallowed guiltily. He knew he had every right to be ungrateful after the way Mr. Chang had treated him, but the guilt trips had been instilled so deep inside him that he could never quite shake them loose. Even so, he continued, tongue loosened by the liquor to the point that he no longer had the option to hush it.
"Between you and me, life in Chang's mansion is hardly different to the orphanage. I'm still nobody's son." His expression hardened bitterly, "I'm still just a number. One of his precious little 'projects', or as he'd call me, a 'godforsaken waste of talent'." A bark of laughter escaped him, and he seemed cruelly amused for a moment, as though he were somehow proud of this. "I don't want to be a f*cking doctor! I don't even want to be here, but d'you think that matters worth a damn? I can't stand blood." He dropped his head into his shaking hands, raging and frustrated, and began rubbing his aching temples as he went on, "I can't stand hospitals either, and I don't give a rat's furry arse about helping people. They've never done anything for me," His one hand dropped from his face to curl into a fist, which slammed hand into his mattress, causing the springs to creak, "Never a damn thing! Why should I dedicate my whole life to saving a species that's so damn flawed, I'm ashamed to call myself a part of it? How the Hell could I ever be a doctor when I couldn't even save Luke-?"
His voice cracked, and suddenly he went dead silent, staring with red-rimmed eyes at the handful of duvet clenched in his fist. He didn't remember even taking hold of it, but even so, he couldn't let go. His gaze was raw from grief, and yet there was neither sadness nor anger in his heavily slumped shoulders. Only defeat. His thoughts had finally reached a truth buried deep inside him, hidden even from himself. A truth they were never supposed to reach.
He shouldn't have been surprised. After all, everything in his life always somehow came back to Luke. It didn't matter what, or how. It was always him.
"I'm just wasting my life here." He mumbled at last, his heavy voice barely coherent, even in the silence, "I'm stuck here, wasting away, and thanks to him," The anger returned to him at the thought of Mr. Chang, and he clenched his jaw so hard that his teeth began to creak, "I'm never going to be anything more than somebody's puppet. That's all I've ever been, and right now, I'm just f*cking sick of having my strings pulled!" His voice rose furiously, shaking with threatening emotion, yet never quite cracking, "But here's the best part - I can't get away. I can't tell him to shove his stupid 'medical plans' up his corporate arse, and I can't even raise a f*cking fist to defend myself, because every time, every f*cking time-" His voice trembled, and then he bit his tongue and went quiet, stopping himself before his loose, drunken mouth could spill any more. Already, he had divulged far, far too much... But there was one thing, no matter how drunk he was, that he never could share. One thing that, somehow, Mr. Chang had found out. One thing that, all by itself, now controlled his entire life.

James lifted his head as Orion began rambling family and - thankfully - dropped the topic of what had happened earlier. But he said that he honestly could hate his family, his foster family, which was surprising, because James found it very hard to honestly hate anyone. Yeah, he disliked, despised, even loathed, people. Like Blondie, he was the prime example. There were things, though, that he wouldn't even wish on that miserable excuse of a person.
"I used to think that I should be more grateful. For him taking me in - Mr. Chang, I mean. My foster father. People always told me how lucky I was, adopted by the famous "Han Chang"."
The quotation marks made it obvious that Orion wasn't lucky at all, and that he really didn't agree with everyone who had that opinion.
"Sure, at first it was nice to live in a big house, to get three meals a day and a free ride through high school and university. Sure. It sounds like a dream life for some poor orphan kid..."
Obviously there was more to Orion's world at this place than he let on. Honestly, though, James was having a hard time seeing where his friend was coming from. If he were an orphan, this would be his dream situation. Be adopted by someone who would pay for all of that stuff for you? And could probably afford to get you more stuff if he really liked you? That was really what James wanted - no form of parents, just someone to reward him when he did well. He was fairly independent, so that system would work well with him.
"Between you and me, life in Chang's mansion is hardly different to the orphanage. I'm still nobody's son. I'm still just a number. One of his precious little 'projects', or as he'd call me, a 'godforsaken waste of talent'."
James frowned, his lips pressing together in a hard line. That was something he couldn't stand; there was some sort of instinct that made him want to protect Orion, to keep him safe. He couldn't quite understand why, but it was there, and the fact that the man was hurting in this way and there was nothing, absolutely nothing, that he could do about it. So he just sat there and listened.
"I don't want to be a f*cking doctor! I don't even want to be here, but d'you think that matters worth a damn? I can't stand blood." That little fact was endearing, and despite himself, James could feel the corner of his mouth flick up. "I can't stand hospitals either, and I don't give a rat's furry arse about helping people. They've never done anything for me. Never a damn thing! Why should I dedicate my whole life to saving a species that's so damn flawed, I'm ashamed to call myself a part of it? How the Hell could I ever be a doctor when I couldn't even save Luke-?"
There was a clench in James's gut. Everything always came back to Luke, it seemed. He didn't know if the feeling was jealousy or the protectiveness or what, but talking about Luke made him uncomfortable in the deepest sense of the word.
Hold on - jealousy?
What the hell would he be jealous of anyway? That Luke had gone out with Orion and he hadn't? James swallowed the lump in his throat as he considered that possibility. It was seriously fucked up if he was actually jealous of a dead man, but maybe it wasn't that. Maybe it was just...
No, it was definitely jealousy. But when did he...
He put his head in his hands and stifled a groan, almost missing Orion's next sentence.
"I'm just wasting my life here. I'm stuck here, wasting away, and thanks to him, I'm never going to be anything more than somebody's puppet. That's all I've ever been, and right now, I'm just f*cking sick of having my strings pulled!"
James bit his lip as he watched Orion get angrier and his voice grow louder, seemingly on the verge of breaking but never reaching that point. His eyes - those beautiful green eyes - were flashing, and even in the dim light, James's breath caught in his throat. The raw emotion within them was paralyzing. He wasn't sure who the "he" was, but it didn't really matter.
"But here's the best part - I can't get away. I can't tell him to shove his stupid 'medical plans' up his corporate arse, and I can't even raise a f*cking fist to defend myself, because every time, every f*cking time-"
The man suddenly cut off in the middle of his sentence. Maybe he just couldn't bear to talk about it; James was having a hard enough time listening.
After a moment of hesitation, the blonde moved forward and sat next to Orion, tentatively wrapping an arm over his shoulders for the second time that night. He didn't know what to say, because there was nothing he could say that would be meaningful or would make it better. So he just sat there, humming a little bit in his throat just to make a little noise. The vibrations reverberated a little through their bodies. He stopped after a moment and sighed.
"I really... I don't even know what to say, other than it's going to be okay." James glanced over at the other man. "And I know that that's something that everyone says, but it will be. Things will get better."

Orion was battling to hold himself together as the memories he'd been repressing all night came rushing back to him. Luke's smile, that little dimple on his one cheek, and the way his eyes were always shining with light, even in the darkest of times. He remembered the sound of his voice, like a thousand merry little bells, and the way his thick, blonde fringe had always fallen over his face. He very nearly smiled at that thought as he recalled how frustrated it had made his boyfriend, but the moment his lips twitched, he felt the grief pull even stronger at the back of his throat, and his eyes dropped down to the duvet again, more sorrowful than ever. 
Then, just as he was beginning to wonder if things could possibly get any worse, he heard a low hum beside him, and felt James wrap an arm comfortingly around his shoulders. Surprised, he looked up, his eyes perhaps a little glassier than usual as they looked over his friend's face. 
"I really... I don't even know what to say, other than it's going to be okay." James turned toward him, and he felt his shoulders slump. He had been hoping for a little more than that.
"And I know that that's something that everyone says," James added, as though reading his mind, "But it will be. Things will get better."
"Better?" He uttered a grim chuckle under his breath, "What, d'you reckon I'll suddenly run into a genie that can bring back the dead?"
Shaking his head stubbornly, he clenched his jaw, and said with a bitter twist of his lips, "Things for me couldn't possibly get-" He stopped suddenly, frowning, then conceded quietly, "Well, I met you. I guess that's better."
Relaxing at last into the arm around his shoulders, he closed his eyes, sighing heavily. The silence stretched on a while after that, broken only by the sounds of their quiet breathing, and the soft ticking of the clock on the wall.
"Thanks." He mumbled at last, reaching up to pat the hand still resting on his shoulder. He looked at James, and at last, managed a sad smile. He was not Luke. He would never be Luke... But he cared, in his own way. And right then, that in itself was enough. Orion didn't need anything else.
Leaning absently into the warmth of James's embrace, he felt his lips part in a yawn, and his eyelids began to droop. All that ranting and raging had finally tired him out, and nw he was about ready to pass out until morning.

Almost immediately, James felt foolish for what he had just said. Of course things wouldn't get better, Orion reminded him. Luke was dead and no one could bring him back, no matter how much they wanted to, and that was all he wanted in life. Again, there was a pang in his chest, but James told himself it was sadness.
"Things for me couldn't possibly get- Well, I met you. I guess that's better."
His cheeks colored as his mind registered the words. The sentence sounded like something from a really cheesy movie or book or something - not something that punk rock, rebellious Orion would say. But then again, James still had a hard time believing he was gay, due to the appearance and all.
He felt like he should have murmured a response or something, something like he felt the same way too, but honestly, his life was probably going to get worse because of Orion. His roommate had forced him to confront his sexuality, and probably wouldn't stick by him to deal with the consequences. It wasn't that the man would abandon him, but it seemed highly unlikely that they would be anything more than friends, and that they would drift apart after graduation.
He swallowed and listed to Orion's quiet thanks and managed to hold back a shudder when the full force of the man's eyes met his. They were sad and empty, and James wanted nothing more than to see them filled with happiness.
That was pretty much impossible.
"Finally you're all tuckered out." He murmured after Orion yawned and curled up against his chest. "Go to sleep. Do you want me to stay here?"
As he waited for a response, he gently pushed Orion down lower and lower until he was fully horizontal, and then placed his hand in the man's mussed up hair. It was peaceful, despite the sadness.

"Finally you're all tuckered out." James commented, and Orion opened his eyes with a grunt at the sound of his voice. He had nearly drifted off for a moment there.
"Go to sleep." His roommate pressed. Then, "Do you want me to stay here?"
Yawning tiredly, Orion nodded, and mumbled a faint, "Mhm." Whatever he'd found with James, he cherished it, and since he had a feeling that come morning it would all go away - for the world always seemed so far from simple without the influence of alcohol - he was not willing to let go just yet.
His eyes met James's for a moment, and then he blinked as a hand pressed down on his head, urging him to lie down. He obeyed - mostly because he was still too drunk and dizzy to resist - and a moment later, he found himself blinking placidly up at his roommate's face, silhouetted by the golden glow of the overhead light. For a moment he just looked, memorizing every handsome feature. Then he sighed, and rolled onto his side.
"Night, James."
And with that, he drifted off to sleep.

***

It was light already when Orion awoke from his alcohol-induced coma, and as soon as his eyes cracked open, he groaned, scrubbing at them with his fists. His head ached. And not even the 'punch in the face' kind of ache, oh no. This felt more like a giant was pushing his head through a pepper grinder.
Wincing, he clutched his temples for a moment, then grunted uncomfortably when a powerful feeling of nausea gripped him. He rolled onto his side, thinking that he might throw up, and still shielding his eyes from the harsh light. Presently, his hand brushed against something warm and soft. Puzzled, he opened his eyes, squinting into the light. For the first time, he was met by a sight that made him wonder if he was, in fact, still asleep and dreaming. There, in his bed, lay his roommate; eyes closed as he slept on peacefully, totally oblivious to Orion's rapidly escalating panic. It took a moment for him to register the arm flopped loosely around his waist, but when he finally did, reality hit with the force of a kicking horse. 
With an exclamation of surprise, he sat bolt-upright, scrambling away until his back was pressed against the wall. His heart twitched visibly through his shirt as it pounded sickeningly in his chest, and he gaped at James in open shock for a moment before the pain of his hangover struck again, incapacitating him. With a groan, he curled into himself, clutching his throbbing head tightly between sweating palms.
What the f*ck happened last night?!
A massive bubble of panic inflated in his throat, and suddenly, the nausea became too much to bear.
Gagging, he scrambled over James - trying not to step on anything too vital - and dashed for the bathroom. He slipped on the mat, collapsing conveniently over the toilet, then grabbed the cool porcelain bowl, and retched so hard he feared he'd bring up his guts. Even as he puked out everything he'd eaten in the past ten years, Orion could think of nothing beyond the thunderous pounding of his heart, and the image of James's sleeping face burned into his retinas.
At last, the nausea began to wear off, and he slowly propped himself up on the toilet seat, swallowing thickly. Then he remembered that night that James had gotten drunk and confessed his fear of being gay, and he felt sick all over again. He was vomiting again before he could even take a breath, though this time it had nothing to do with the hangover.
Suddenly - in blurry, disjointed memories - the previous night came rushing back to him.
James... What have I done to you?
He coughed pitifully, then rolled some toilet paper around his hand and wiped his mouth, flushing the toilet with a look of half-formed disgust. Then he turned robotically to the basin, and went through the motions of washing out his mouth and brushing his teeth until the acrid taste of bile burning his mouth vanished entirely. He still felt sick, and when he stepped out of the bathroom and looked at James, it multiplied tenfold. He felt like the scum of the earth.
I can just barely stand being gay myself... And now I've gone and dragged him into it! His fists clenched tightly at his sides. He was so furious with himself, it was all he could do to keep from punching the wall.
"James?" At last, his hoarse voice managed to croak out his roommate's name. He rubbed his face, then leaned wearily against the wall, clutching at his own hair with a distraught expression. "About last night..."

James sighed as he felt Orion relax against him, and let himself slide down until the shorter man's body was nestled in front of his comfortably. In a quick moment, Orion's breathing slowed down and all of the tension flowed away from his muscles. A light snore picked up, and James had to smile at that.
"Good night." He murmured again, softly, and let his head drop against the pillow. Soon, he was asleep too.

***

James was kicked awake all too soon. He groaned curled in instinctively, protecting his vital organs, and the lump moved over him.
"What-" he began to say, but was cut off once again as something heavy moved over him - stepping, unfortunately, on his barely healed wrist. A sharp stab of pain shot through his nerves, and he barely bit back a yell. As it was, he hissed out a few curses.
There was a loud thud and the sound of a door slamming against a wall. After a moment silence, the unmistakable sound of retching began from the bathroom.
James opened his eyes, squinting against the light of the sun, and peered across the room. He could see Orion's foot poking out of the bathroom. That, combined with the fact that he was not in his own bed, reminded him of what happened the night before, and.... and...
Well fuck me over sideways and toss this shit to Hell's gate, he thought, using Carson's favorite swear phrase.
This was not good. Obviously Orion thought so too. James felt his cheeks flushing as he realized that. He didn't want to be rejected, especially not by someone who he would have to see every day, and....
He swallowed nervously and sat there, with his head in his hands and stayed there until he heard footsteps approaching the bunk.
"James? About last night..."
James held up a hand to silence him, and then proceeded to climb down the bunk.
"I understand." He said calmly, although coldly. "You were drunk. I tried to tell you no, but you wouldn't take it. But that's okay; I'm not expecting anything, I know you said you don't want a boyfriend. Besides, I'm straight." He tried to smile a little, as the last part was supposed to be a joke, but he couldn't. He just felt like crawling into a hole and staying there for the rest of his life. Since he couldn't, he did the next best thing, and grabbed a change of clothes and headed into the bathroom. The stench was too much, so he left, and instead walked over to Aine's room, not even saying good bye to his roommate or telling him where he was going.
The redhead opened the door as soon as James knocked, almost as if she were expecting him.
"Orion threw up." He said, shrugging, voice trembling a little. "Can I shower here?"
She nodded and let him come in, saying nothing. Her half of the room was tidy, although her roommate's was not. How funny.
He mechanically walked into the bathroom, which was identical to his, and closed the door, stripping off his outfit and stepping into the water, letting the warmth seep into his weary body.

Aine immediately walked to James's room in his place and knocked on the door. "Let me in!" She called, her thick Irish accent ringing in the hallway.

Before he could even begin explaining, James held up a hand, and Orion stopped obediently, looking appropriately contrite as he watched his friend cimb down from the bunk, then turn and say, "I understand." Orion flinched at the ice in his tone.
"You were drunk. I tried to tell you no, but you wouldn't take it. But that's okay; I'm not expecting anything, I know you said you don't want a boyfriend. Besides, I'm straight."
His lips tightened dubiously, but he said nothing. At this point, he wasn't even sure if James was being serious or not. Either way, he couldn't see the humour in the situation. What he had done, to put it crudely, sucked ass. Being drunk didn't justify a thing.
"James-" He tried to speak again, but his roommate brushed past him, grabbing a change of clothes and heading for the door.
"James, wait-" He stumbled a step after him, then stopped, feeling woozy all over again. "Just let me expl-"
The door slammed shut, and Orion felt his shoulders slump as he stared at the spot where his roommate had vanished, feeling as though an iron fist in his stomach was tying his guts in knots. When all was said and done, he really did care about James. The man had become a precious friend to him, and to be avoided in this way stung horribly. He knew he deserved it, and he couldn't fault James on walking away, but even so... It hurt. He only wished he had managed to apologize first...
Feeling sick all over again, he groaned and slid down onto the floor, resting his shoulders against the wall behind him and clutching his throbbing head in his hands.
Minutes later, a knock sounded on the door, far too loud for his aching temples. He winced, and curled over further, groaning to himself. 
"Let me in!" A sharp Irish voice called from outside, and Orion groaned even louder. Great. Excellent. This was all that he needed.
"It's open." He admitted reluctantly, sighing heavily and trying to get to his feet. Halfway, he gave up. Nothing was worth standing right then, not even his own sense of dignity.
"What do you want?" He asked as Aine entered the room, trying hard not to sound cold of snippy. He didn't mind Aine, and he didn't mean to be abrupt. Unfortunately, with his head ringing like the whistle of a train, 'abrupt' was pretty much the best reaction he had.

James wasn't kidding about the smell, Aine thought as soon as she stepped into the room. She wrinkled her nose at the odor and looked at Orion sitting on the ground, looking like shit, to put it nicely.
"What do you want?"
She sighed and stepped over to him lightly, sliding to the ground beside him before straightening out her blue and white striped skirt.
"James came to shower in my room looking more than a little upset." She told him, not bothering to sugar-coat it or anything. "And I really doubt that it was because of the loss of his ability to shower without being assaulted by the stench."
She sat there for a little bit longer, thinking about how the blonde had looked when she opened the door. His hair was all mussed up - so unlike all of the times before when she had seen him, with it combed perfectly to the side. Even his sweatpants were rumpled, and the white tee the hung limply over his skinny frame was creased and folded. He had looked so unlike himself that she was startled into speechlessness. Orion looked much the same, except the look suited him, especially in his obvious hangover.
"Care to tell me what happened?" Her voice was softer now, gentler. She reached a hand up to push a lock of orange hair behind her ear as she gazed intently at Orion's face, seeming not at all affected by the shade of his eyes.

"James came to shower in my room looking more than a little upset." Orion grunted in response, looking even more miserable when Aine confirmed what he already knew, "And I really doubt that it was because of the loss of his ability to shower without being assaulted by the stench."
"I wouldn't put it past him." He joked dryly, but even he was not amused by the poor attempt. Sighing heavily, he lowered his aching head, and began massaging his temples again. He felt awful. God awful. 
Aine was quiet for a little while, then her voice softened as she asked, "Care to tell me what happened?"
He shrugged - a dismissive, non-committal gesture - and tried to look away. But Aine's eyes followed him, locking intently on his so that he could feel them burning, even when he turned away to glare at the ground. He could feel the pressure building.
"I don't want to talk about it." He sighed at least, sounding weary and defeated, "We had a rough night, and that's about it. I was so wasted I barely remember half of it."
But I do remember what I did to James... If I didn't, this would probably be a whole lot easier to deal with.
"Ugh." He pulled a face, "You know what? Screw this. I'm going for a drive." With a staggering effort, he hauled himself to his feet, leaning against the wall for support.
"Sorry, Aine." He said stubbornly, "But I don't feel like talking about it. This is between me and James." He shuffled over to the desk, still rubbing his head, and picked up the keys to his bike. Even if he had wanted to talk to Aine, he couldn't. She didn't even know he was gay ((Sure, Oreo. XD )), and that was not exactly something that he wanted to make public knowledge. He had worked hard to build himself a certain reputation - a bad one - and he didn't want to risk doing anything to damage that. He couldn't talk. James was his one and only confidant. Was.

Aine sighed as Orion told her that he didn't want to talk; she was expecting as much. Whatever had happened between them must have been pretty personal. James didn't seem to be the kind of guy to get so upset over petty things, so either Orion insulted his musical composition ability or they got into a heated argument about.... well, Aine had an idea, but she didn't want to push it.
However, when he got up and told her that he was going for a drive, that was too much.
"Oh no you're not." She said, jumping up behind him and sprinting to the door. She stopped in front of it, feet planted firmly on the floor and arms crossed against her chest. She looked silly standing there, looking so angry, as small as she was. "Not in that state, you're not. You can barely walk. Look at you." She nodded at him as he stood there, eyes squinting against the brightness of the day. "You'll get sick halfway through and crash and die, and I'm not letting that happen. Even if you don't want to talk, you're not leaving this room."
The girl walked over to him, skirt swishing around her pale legs, and slapped her hand onto his shoulder, pushing him into the chair. "Sit down, kiddo. If you're not going to tell me what James is all upset about, you can at least tell me what happened to your face, right? By the way, did you put any ice on that, because it's swelling up really badly." She frowned at his eye, gave him a stern warning not to move, and disappeared into the bathroom.
When she emerged from the room with a damp towel, she made a gagging face. "It reeks in there. Don't ever drink again." And with that, she placed the cool cloth over his eye and held it there, looking expectantly at him, waiting for him to tell her what happened.

Just as Orion was about to reach the door, Aine darted out in front of him, arms spread, and told him fiercely, "Not in that state, you're not. You can barely walk. Look at you."
He grunted, shrugging half-heartedly. She was right, but even so...
"You'll get sick halfway through and crash and die, and I'm not letting that happen. Even if you don't want to talk, you're not leaving this room."
He didn't bother objecting to that after seeing the look on Aine's face, so when she walked over to him and pushed him back, he sat down obediently on the chair behind him, still looking rather disheveled. 
"Sit down, kiddo. If you're not going to tell me what James is all upset about, you can at least tell me what happened to your face, right? By the way, did you put any ice on that, because it's swelling up really badly."
"I put beer on it." He answered dryly, as if that was an appropriate response. Ignoring him, Aine turned around and vanished into the bathroom, leaving Orion to sulk on his own until she returned, and placed a cold cloth over his eye.
"It reeks in there." She complained, pulling a face, "Don't ever drink again."
"Sorry."
The coolness of the damp towel felt good against his bruised face, and after a moment, Orion took it from Aine with a murmur of thanks, holding it to his own cheek. She looked at him expectantly, and he sighed, resigned at last to giving her some sort of answer. He was too sore and too tired to remain stubborn for long. And besides that, his sense of pride was deeply wounded. It was easier to give in, now that he felt he had nothing much to protect.
"I got into a bit of a disagreement with my foster father." He admitted at last, wrinkling his nose at the thought, "I guess he wasn't too impressed with my study habits. In any case, I figured that trying to consume my body weight in alcohol would be more constructive than 'accidentally' running him down with my bike." He uttered a little snort of amusement, shaking his head. "Right now, I'm thinking maybe I made the wrong choice after all."

"I got into a bit of a disagreement with my foster father."
Well, that was interesting. Aine had assumed that it was something James had done with whatever had upset him, but looking at the bruise now, it was clear that the aggressor had a practiced punch and a lot of muscle - neither of which James had.
But a family situation was bad, very bad. Especially if Orion - Orion - didn't feel safe enough to step up and defend himself.
"I guess he wasn't too impressed with my study habits. In any case, I figured that trying to consume my body weight in alcohol would be more constructive than 'accidentally' running him down with my bike."
The girl continued listening patiently, offering no reaction to his words. When he made a comment about how he might not have made the right decision, she rolled her eyes.
"If you had run him over, you would be sitting in jail with an angry foster father who would probably do worse than punch you when he found out." She told him with a shrug. "Instead you're just nursing a hangover with a crazy girl and a friend who's probably drowning in his tears right now. Or maybe not - I couldn't really tell if he was sad or angry. Probably both. It was weird, because I'm usually really good at judging people."
She gave him a knowing glance, and then sighed and ran a hand through her hair, wincing as she pulled out a tangle. After this conversation was done, she would probably try to clean up this room. That would be a nice gesture of friendship - something, she thought, she finally had. James running to her room was evidence to the theory, and the fact that people were connecting to her was thrilling, even if they both were gay. Although was pretty gay herself, so it didn't really matter.

"If you had run him over, you would be sitting in jail with an angry foster father who would probably do worse than punch you when he found out."
"I'm saying..." He winced, rubbing again at his sore head. Okay, so maybe it was over-dramatic to think that the mess he'd got himself into was worse than jail, but the notion of running over Mr. Chang was an entertaining one to nurse, in any case. 
"Instead" Aine continued reasonably, "You're just nursing a hangover with a crazy girl and a friend who's probably drowning in his tears right now. Or maybe not - I couldn't really tell if he was sad or angry. Probably both. It was weird, because I'm usually really good at judging people."
At this, Orion groaned, burying his face in his hands again. As if he didn't feel bad enough already... The imagine of James's tear-stained face was not one that he wanted in his mind's eye. He couldn't help but think that if Aine was as good at judging people as she said, she would not have brought that up. Then again, maybe she thought - as he himself did too - that he hadn't suffered quite enough for what he'd done to James, and the additional hurt would fit in nicely with the guilt already wracking his mind.
His jaw clenched, and after a moment, so did his fists, trembling ever so slightly in his lap. He didn't want to lose his friend. He wanted to make things right. He just couldn't stand the thought of his life going back to how it was before, when he avoided everyone and tackled all his problems in solitude.
'And here you thought things couldn't get any worse,' he mocked himself bitterly, his lips tightening at the thought.
"I need to talk to him." Orion said quietly, "It isn't right that he should be upset because of me... I never intended that."
I never intended any of this... As always, no matter how good my intentions, the consequences so seldom reflect it.
His jaw clenched tighter, and his teeth ground together until he heard one of them crack threateningly. He licked his lips, then pushed his scruffy fringe wearily out of his face.
How could I have let this happen?

"I need to talk to him. It isn't right that he should be upset because of me... I never intended that."
Aine rolled her eyes. "You do need to talk to him, that's for sure." She conceded. "But I really doubt that that's something you should do right now, with finals and everything. Besides, what are you even going to say?"
Orion still had his face buried in his hands, and she saw his jaw clenching tightly beneath his fringe of dark hair. She pursed her lips together and sighed.
"Look at me, Orion." She placed a finger under his chin and tilted his face upwards to meet her eyes. He looked kind of ridiculous, with his hair all messed up and one eyes hidden behind a blue towel, but she didn't laugh. He looked like a lost puppy, despite all the black. "James isn't going to be mad about this forever. He doesn't have that many friends, and cherishes the ones he has too much to get pissed at them like this. You guys will be fine after a few weeks."
She patted his cheek and moved away, choosing to sit in the chair across from him. Slowly, she traced her thumb in small circles over the surface of the desk. Not looking at him, she talked again. "I mean, if you insulted him or something, you might want to apologize about that, but I don't think that that was what happened - at least not blatantly. You definitely wounded his pride and hurt his feelings, but how..." She started drumming her fingers on the desk pensively. Suddenly she snapped them and looked at Orion. "If I guess, will you tell me? Like that game people always played as little kids when people tried to guess their crushes?"

When Aine mentioned that talking to James right away was probably a bad idea, Orion just grunted in response. He knew exactly what he'd say. That he was sorry for pushing James when he knew well how he felt. That, although he never had intended to strive for a relationship, he still treasured his friendship, and didn't want to lose him. That he'd meant everything he said, even as drunk as he was... That he cared deeply, perhaps too much, about the fact that he'd hurt him. And he was sorry. God, he was so sorry...
The thought left him groaning again, feeling worse than ever, and then Aine sighed and touched a finger to his chin.
"Look at me, Orion."
He obeyed weakly.
"James isn't going to be mad about this forever. He doesn't have that many friends, and cherishes the ones he has too much to get pissed at them like this. You guys will be fine after a few weeks."
'That's not good enough', he wanted to say, 'I don't give a damn how long he's mad at me for. It'll take me ten times that to forgive myself. I have to make things right now - I have to!'
Aine patted his cheek, and he shook his head, casting his frustrated gaze aside. He could feel the anger growing, black and glutinous as it bubbled somewhere deep in his chest. It had been years since he'd felt it like this... 
Aine went on chattering to herself at the other table, but Orion had stopped listening. If he had to hear any more about how he'd hurt James - which he knew all too well - he feared what he might do. A desperate man was a rash man, and he intended to be neither. James was not dead. He was in the room just across the hall. It wasn't too late to apologise. Not to him.
I should calm down. I'm overthinking this. All we have to do is sit down and talk this out like men.
He took a deep breath and released it slowly, trying to get a grip on himself. Trying to tell himself that everything would be okay. 
"If I guess, will you tell me?" Aine's voice started him, and he looked up with a murmur of surprise. For a moment, he'd forgotten she was there.
"Like that game people always played as little kids when people tried to guess their crushes?"
He stared at her a long moment, frowning thoughtfully. She meant well, he could tell that much. He thought that he could trust her... And, maybe she could be a useful tool in bringing James around, at least enough to hear him out.
He hesitated a moment longer, then slowly nodded.
"Yeah." He murmured at last, sighing his resignation, "Why the f*ck not? What've I got to lose?"

Aine fought to keep the grin off her face as Orion agreed to her game. Obviously he didn't know how good she was at this - because she was already completely sure that she had the situation already figured out - or he was just that desperate to talk about it but unwilling to show it. She made a show of pacing around the room for a few moments, stopping every now and then to scrutinize Orion as if she were pondering. Suddenly she stopped and snapped her fingers in the air.
"You got into an angry couple fight." She said, observing him carefully. "Maybe James finally found out that he's gay and got mad about it?" She frowned and glared at the ground. "No, that wouldn't be the topic of the couple fight. Or would it?"
She started pacing again and waved at Orion to let him know that she was talking to herself and not to him. "Something happened, his feelings were hurt, but not just insulted, it was something more than that, but not something he won't recover from... So it wasn't a direct argument. Just something... snapped. And you were drunk..."
Aine sighed, not feeling up to putting all of the pieces together herself.
"Something extremely gay happened and James got upset. Maybe you were upset too, but I'm not psychic enough to figure that part out." Eagerly she turned to face him, waiting his response.